Skip to main content

Trying New Parenting Techniques

If you are interested in child development, child psychology and a behind-the-scenes look into kids as you are trying to parent them, you really should be reading the Child of Mind site. Recently, Bella and Tracy have been writing about discipline and parenting techniques for dealing with those kids of ours. I particularly enjoyed the posts on the coercive cycle and being a flexible parent.

Recently Bella offered to sort of host a parenting challenge. For this challenge, she is going to post a write up about a different parenting technique on Mondays, and those who want to try it out over the week should do so and then comment about how it is working in that Monday post. I'm always wanting to learn new parenting tools, especially with a place to discuss its effectiveness with other parents whose opinions I admire, so I'm in for the challenge.

This week, the parenting challenge is "Let's Pretend." She highlights a strategy from Playful Parenting, one of my favorite parenting books. I tried it out on Tuesday morning, because mornings can be so frustrating in my house. And? It worked like a dream that morning!

I do love to be a "playful parent," although it can be so hard when I'm really tired, stressed, depressed or rushed. There are times when I just want the Pumpkin to just do what I say because I said so or because it just has to be done. There are times when I don't want to have to come up with a game just to try to get her to do things.

At those times, I try to remember that I want children who cooperate with me and others, not ones who mindlessly comply. I don't want to raise children who are automatons, who follow authority figures and simply do what they are told. But as the book Raising Your Spirited Child pointed out, the traits we admire in adults can be so frustrating in our children.

Regardless, playing "Let's Pretend" is right up my girl's alley, and mine as well. This is one I have used in the past and will continue to use. Feel free to join in the parenting challenge if you are interested!


mom2boys said…
Going to try this!!
Becoming Mommy said…
We do a little bit of it. Sasha is normally a great eater, but once in a while he becomes super ornery and refuses everything. And, while he's a sweet boy, he aint when he's hungry.

So I don't say 'lets pretend,' we just do it.

Dinner becomes Rinocerous with Monkey sauce or some such thing. Lots of giggles and he's back to eating. No fight.
Bella said…
Thanks for this great review of what we're trying to do! You've been so supportive in the comments and so thoughtful in your response to other readers. Just wanted to say I really appreciate it (and I've been following and appreciating your comments on Moxie's blog for ages, btw).

And I'm TOTALLY trying out the different hats idea. Getting mine to get out the door in the winter has been SUCH a battle. This little game/opportunity for choices I KNOW will hook them... at least for a little while anyway.

Popular posts from this blog

Baby Fidgets in Sleep (and While Awake)

Since I've started this blog, I've had quite a few visitors find me through a search for something like "baby fidgets in sleep" or "baby fidgets in bed" or simply "baby fidgets." This leads me to believe that there are others out there with fidgety babies who drive them crazy enough to search on the internet for some information about fidgeting babies. So I thought I'd do a whole post to discuss the fidgety nature of my child and how I deal with it.

Do you want to know when my child first started fidgeting? IN UTERO!! I'm not kidding. When I was pregnant, this baby moved a lot. She was very often kicking and pushing and hiccuping. OMG, the hiccups! I thought they would drive me nuts. Every. Single. Day. For. Months. Straight. Often more than once a day. I am not exaggerating--you can ask Londo or the many people I worked with, all of whom had to hear about it. I just thought it was part of being pregnant, and it probably is, but I've al…

Some Babies Just Fidget

I have mentioned before that we had a very fidgety baby. It's been a while sinced I talked about it. Although she is still pretty fidgety, at her currently toddler stage it seems more normal and has in many ways translated into bigger, general movements, like climbing.

But I still get a ton of search hits that have to do with baby fidgeting or flailing while sleeping or nursing. Some people stay around and read a bit, and I hope they get what they need from the posts I wrote specifically aboutthis topic hoping that others realize they are not alone. Most people don't stay at all, and I figure they are probably looking for medical reasons why babies fidget (like I would).

Then I got this comment, which does indeed show that people are looking for medical reason. Anonymous said that she wasn't sure if the Pumpkin's fidgets were as severe are her 3.5 month old. Well anonymous, I can't be positive since I haven't seen your child, but at some points they were as bad …

Fidgety Baby Growing Up

My daughter was a very fidgety baby. More fidgety than any other baby I knew through all my years of babysitting, being an aunt and having friends and family with babies. So fidgety that I wondered if something was wrong, if there was an underlying reason for her fidgetiness.

There really wasn’t anything wrong. As far as I can tell, she simply has a LOT of energy in her body. Her father is the same way. Londo is full of energy and has always been a fidgeter. And me? I can’t sit in one position for a long period of time. I don’t really fidget so much as I shift positions periodically, and I don’t think I ever simply sit normal, facing forward with both feet on the ground when I’m in a chair. In fact, sitting normal sounds like torture to me.

But three years ago, when the Pumpkin was a few months old and through her babyhood, I didn’t know why she was fidgeting so much. When I would nurse her, when we’d be rocking her to sleep, when we would try to hold her calmly, when we’d be lying in…