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This Is No Name Game

I have previously mentioned that Londo and I have very different tastes in names, especially boys names. I insisted that he and I go through the book with over 55,000 names in it. And we did, on our trip down to Atlanta. A nice way to pass the time in the car. Except... we simply cannot agree on a name.

Londo and I usually are on the same page about most things, but this is just not one of them. We did come up with a short list, and that list has quickly whittled down to just 2 or 3. You'd think that's a good thing, right? We're getting closer! Except... neither of us seem to really like the names on our list.

It feels like we are just settle. And I hate to "settle" for things. To be frank, I really like to get my way, but do so in a way that has Londo on board because he realizes I'm right. That's not too much to ask, is it? hehe.

With the Pumpkin, we had a short list of 3 names, but both of us really loved the name we picked for her. And I love it more and more each day. It's really beautiful, has a bunch of nicknames we can use, and seems to fit her well. So I've been waiting for the perfect boy name to jump out at us. For us to look at each other and say, "Yeah. That's the perfect name." But that ain't happening.

I must also admit that part of my frustration is that I've agreed that his middle name will be my husband's middle name, which was his father's and his grandfather's. I think it's no secret to my husband that I don't really like the name. The teasing factor alone is hard for me to get over. But it means a lot to him. Seriously, a lot. As in, we have been talking about this middle name for our son years before we even starting trying to conceive the first time! Finally, I agreed when we found out this one was a boy.

So in my mind, Londo already has given this boy the middle name and the last name. In my mind, that means I get to pick the first name my opinions on first names should have at least a little more weight to them than his opinions. That's seems fair, doesn't it? After I brought this up to Londo, he begrudgingly agreed.

So back to the short list. Londo spit out lovingly asked, "Then which one do you want?" And you know what I realized? I DON'T WANT ANY OF THEM! I'm guessing it has more to do with my frustration with the whole thing (and my crazy pregnancy hormones) than really not liking the names. I'm ready to just name him "Baby Brudda" and Londo is now just teasing me by throwing out the ridiculous like "Optimus Prime."

So not only do I have a big delimma about summer grooming and my oversized chest (yippie for Trannyhead answering my important questions today!), as well as so many other issues with being pregnant, but I don't think this boy is going to get a name! URG! Did I mention how much I love being pregnant? At this point, we've agreed to not talk about names for a couple of weeks and try again after a much needed break. I'm not sure it'll go any better, but we both definitely need the break.


My wife and I went through a similar dilemma. We didn't know the sex of our first child until he was born, so we chose one boy name and one girl name. Choosing both was a long and painful process, but we eventually settled on names. Choosing the boy name was much harder because we strongly disagreed on first names and I had already picked a middle name (to honor a deceased best friend). We're expecting again, and we're really hoping it's a girl. We both really like the name we settled on last time. In case it's a boy again, we have to go through tedious searches and painful negotiations again. Ugh.
- Dana said…
We are having similar issues with the boy names. Why are boys names so much harder to pick out than girl names for us? At this point, he might get named "Doll", like Aria suggested. Poor kid.
paola said…
I was never really into my daughter's name (Zoe)until after she was born. My husband loved it, but I settled, becasue all the names I liked just didn't go with his surname and it seemed better than the second/third choice. But it was something he was passionate about and I wasn't, and I think that it is important that at least someone is passionate about the name. So she got Zoe (pronounced Zoh-eh alla Italiana)and she really is a'Zoe'. I would not want any other name for her now.
Cloud said…
Ugh. Good luck finding the name. Maybe go back through the name book one more time? With us, we had settled on a short list, but I wasn't all that excited about the names on the list. They weren't BAD, but they weren't RIGHT, you know? So I went back through the book one more time, and ended up finding the name we chose.

We have a sort of similar problem with middle names. We had joke boy and girl names from back before we were married, when we'd laugh about having kids some day. The girl's name was normal enough that I could accept it, even like it, as Pumpkin's middle name. Hubby is insisting that if we have a boy, the middle name should be our joke boy's name. But it is a little too out there for me. I'm not sure what will end up happening. Its just a middle name, right? But this may be part of why I'm sort of hoping for another girl....
I'm Not Skippy said…

Best site ever.
OneTiredEma said…
I think....there is something to be said for relaxing a little bit and seeing what "fits" him, even after he is born.

We only settled on AM's name a couple of weeks before he was born, and it was a huge relief to me that the nickname we wanted to use seemed to suit him. (I know it sounds ridiculous, but it really felt right to call him that in my head, but only after he was born.)

I also don't know if the meanings of names, or other associations like that, have any importance to you; that was always a factor for us, in addition to how they sounded, and helped clear up some lingering doubts.

Good luck--it's a big project :-)
I'm Not Skippy said…
Also Diesel Manpower is a good name.
Katie said…
*snork* at Trannyhead.
nutmeg96 said…
I agree you get more say because J got the middle name. I think you should pick 5 names you love and he can select from that list!
HeatherY said…
Hopefully you can agree on something before the little guy makes an appearance. That trannyhead post was hilarious!
ImpostorMom said…
I know how you feel. Before we found out that Boog was a boy we argued and argued about girl names. The boy name we'd had picked out for ages before we were even trying because both first and middle are family names. But a girl name, it's likely that if he'd been a girl we would have gone all the way to delivery with out having a clear choice.

Now with a potential second child, I already have a girl name picked out because I plan to implore the same naming convention we used with Boog's name. His first name is from my hub's family and his middle name is from my family. It's only fair that if we have a girl we do the same thing but in reverse. My husband is not wild about the first name i've picked but I'm getting my way cause he got his for our son's name. Of course I also love our son's name but that's beside the point. :) this of course means that any second child we have will naturally be another boy because we won't be doing a family name if it's another boy.

If your husband got to pick the middle name I say it's only fair you get to pick the first.
Karen said…
I'm in agreement that you should get a bigger say in the first name. Just put it on the papers at the hospital, what's he going to do?
Just found you via Ask Moxie (when you commented that your crazy pregnancy hormones made you weepy at the horrible comments of some parents to their children, I was thinking ME TOO!) And since I'm moving to NoVA this summer, I plan to lurk on over a bit!

We are so close to having our second (any day now!) and STILL don't have a name. Ours is now and may forever be known as Lima Bean, poor girl.

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