Well hello April!
Remember when I said that work was killing me but I thought things were calming down? They weren't. It's just been one thing after another.
But last weekend, we released the redesigned system! Yeah! And though it was a TON of hard work, I am really proud of what my team has done. We have really improved a system that is critical for the Agency where I work. We have made it easier for people to do their jobs. We have worked with users to make sure their needs are met by the new system. And we have raised the bar for all the other systems where I work. :-)
The release didn't go smoothly, of course. It rarely does. But because of some constraints, it almost went really poorly. In fact, Friday night we were considering rolling back and delaying the release, which would have caused all sorts of problems. We decided to regroup the next morning.
That night, I had the worst dream of my life. And that is saying something, because in the winters my increase of melatonin gives me really vivid dreams, and my depression and anxiety tend to make the vivid dreams mostly nightmares. I've been in war zones, I've been hunted by snipers, I've been chased by a shark, I've had crazy time limits to do important things, I've had ugly fights with close friends, and goodness knows what else.
Friday night my bad dream went from having problems with the release, to being naked in public, to the worst of all... my son almost drowning. Truly, that was the most awful dream I've had my whole life. I barely got there in time to perform CPR and get him breathing again.
I can't even think about it anymore. And I'm really mad at my psyche! As if I haven't had horrible dreams for a good chunk of my life, my subconscious now knows just how to hit me the hardest. My children.
The good news is that my developers worked late Friday night, so when we re-grouped Saturday morning they had a fix for us to test. We were able to release the fix on Saturday, and the new system was available for users Monday morning!
And now I'm taking a few days off to get a bit of my life back and mostly spend time with my children while their school is off for spring break!
Thursday, April 21, 2011
Monday, March 28, 2011
Question of the Week - Signs of a Regression
Because my daughter goes through those periods of disequilibrium on a quarterly basis (instead of the half-year basis it says in all the books), sometimes it feels like we are constantly dealing with developmental regressions. Which is, of course, frustrating. It can feel like every time we see progress, we back slide in development.
I know this isn't true, though. Not all progress is lost. Not by a long shot. I would say it's actually 3 or 4 steps forward, 1 step back. (Maybe sometimes it's 2 steps back.) And what's really neat about the quarterly developmental cycles is that we get to see the Pumpkin make developmental progress earlier than most her age.
But since we got through these regressions a lot, and now with two kids, we are getting really good at knowing the signs.
The Pumpkin's top 10 signs that she's going through a developmental regression are:
10. She wants help with things she used to want to do herself, like washing her hands.
9. She insists she can't do something she could before and needs us to do it for her, like putting on her shoes.
8. She says she's "scared" of things that she hasn't mentioned in a while, like dark rooms or "biting snakes" and sharks in her room.
7. She goes through a phase of separation anxiety, from school drop-offs to needing us to wait for her so we can go downstairs together.
6. Her ability to concentrate goes out the window, and she flits from one thing to another without putting anything away.
5. Any impulse control she had developed is pretty much gone, with her grabbing things from the counter and doing things she shouldn't like pushing her brother which totally drive us crazy.
4. She has difficulty "listening to her body" when she is hungry or thirsty or has to go potty, resulting in some meltdowns and pee pee in her underpants.
3. She has potty regressions, including emptying her bladder at 3:00 AM in our bed while she slept like a rock through it--until we finally were able to wake her up and she and I had a middle-of-the-night shower while Londo did middle-of-the-night laundry and bed change.
2. There are unreasonable, unforeseen tantrums and meltdowns over things that normally wouldn't be a big deal, like not wanting to wear jeans or even pants even though it's cold outside.
And the number 1 sign that my daughter is going through a developmental regression...
...
...
1. Trouble Sleeping! (Even more than usual, that is.) It all just gets worse than usual, from not being settling down prior to bed, to a long time falling asleep, to being wide awake in the middle of the night or really early in the wee hours of the morning.
Yes, I'm sure you all guessed it. It's pretty obvious. The good news is that it shouldn't last much longer, and at least she is somewhat more able to reason and think things through than she was for any of the previous regressions.
Here's an example of that: When she peed in our bed at 3:00 AM and was so hard to wake, I thought for sure that she would flip out when she finally woke up and I took her into the shower. I thought there would for sure be one of those middle-of-the-night crazy tantrums that we used to go through, especially trying to get her to shower. But no, once she woke up and we explained what happened, I whisked her into the bathroom without her making even a peep. I hurriedly got us both undressed and started warming up the shower.
As I started to usher her into the shower, she balked for a second. Oh, no. Here we go, I thought. But you'll never guess what she did: She reached over for some bath toys and then got in the shower with them and me. No complaining, not upset at all. We even had a fun and quick shower. When we got out and she went to brush her teeth, I had to explain that it was still the middle of the night and we needed to go back to sleep. And she said, "Oh, right." And we did.
So this week's Question of the Week is:
What are the signs your kid(s) displays when they are going through a regression?
My son is still so young (21 months) that his signs are pretty average for toddlers, I think. He needs more help falling asleep. He wakes up in the night, usually just once a night for a few nights in a row. He gets extra clingy to me. He gets extra fussy, especially at the Witching Hour(s) before and after dinner.
What about your kids? Do you get typical signs of clingy-ness and fussiness? Have any fun tantrums or night wakings? Have you figured out any patterns or timing to the regressions? Do share, because I know we all go through it!
I know this isn't true, though. Not all progress is lost. Not by a long shot. I would say it's actually 3 or 4 steps forward, 1 step back. (Maybe sometimes it's 2 steps back.) And what's really neat about the quarterly developmental cycles is that we get to see the Pumpkin make developmental progress earlier than most her age.
But since we got through these regressions a lot, and now with two kids, we are getting really good at knowing the signs.
The Pumpkin's top 10 signs that she's going through a developmental regression are:
10. She wants help with things she used to want to do herself, like washing her hands.
9. She insists she can't do something she could before and needs us to do it for her, like putting on her shoes.
8. She says she's "scared" of things that she hasn't mentioned in a while, like dark rooms or "biting snakes" and sharks in her room.
7. She goes through a phase of separation anxiety, from school drop-offs to needing us to wait for her so we can go downstairs together.
6. Her ability to concentrate goes out the window, and she flits from one thing to another without putting anything away.
5. Any impulse control she had developed is pretty much gone, with her grabbing things from the counter and doing things she shouldn't like pushing her brother which totally drive us crazy.
4. She has difficulty "listening to her body" when she is hungry or thirsty or has to go potty, resulting in some meltdowns and pee pee in her underpants.
3. She has potty regressions, including emptying her bladder at 3:00 AM in our bed while she slept like a rock through it--until we finally were able to wake her up and she and I had a middle-of-the-night shower while Londo did middle-of-the-night laundry and bed change.
2. There are unreasonable, unforeseen tantrums and meltdowns over things that normally wouldn't be a big deal, like not wanting to wear jeans or even pants even though it's cold outside.
And the number 1 sign that my daughter is going through a developmental regression...
...
...
1. Trouble Sleeping! (Even more than usual, that is.) It all just gets worse than usual, from not being settling down prior to bed, to a long time falling asleep, to being wide awake in the middle of the night or really early in the wee hours of the morning.
Yes, I'm sure you all guessed it. It's pretty obvious. The good news is that it shouldn't last much longer, and at least she is somewhat more able to reason and think things through than she was for any of the previous regressions.
Here's an example of that: When she peed in our bed at 3:00 AM and was so hard to wake, I thought for sure that she would flip out when she finally woke up and I took her into the shower. I thought there would for sure be one of those middle-of-the-night crazy tantrums that we used to go through, especially trying to get her to shower. But no, once she woke up and we explained what happened, I whisked her into the bathroom without her making even a peep. I hurriedly got us both undressed and started warming up the shower.
As I started to usher her into the shower, she balked for a second. Oh, no. Here we go, I thought. But you'll never guess what she did: She reached over for some bath toys and then got in the shower with them and me. No complaining, not upset at all. We even had a fun and quick shower. When we got out and she went to brush her teeth, I had to explain that it was still the middle of the night and we needed to go back to sleep. And she said, "Oh, right." And we did.
So this week's Question of the Week is:
What are the signs your kid(s) displays when they are going through a regression?
My son is still so young (21 months) that his signs are pretty average for toddlers, I think. He needs more help falling asleep. He wakes up in the night, usually just once a night for a few nights in a row. He gets extra clingy to me. He gets extra fussy, especially at the Witching Hour(s) before and after dinner.
What about your kids? Do you get typical signs of clingy-ness and fussiness? Have any fun tantrums or night wakings? Have you figured out any patterns or timing to the regressions? Do share, because I know we all go through it!
Thursday, March 17, 2011
Back From Unplanned Hiatus
Apparently it's been two weeks since I last posted, which is the longest I've gone without posting since I started blogging. I've missed it and written many posts in my head about the many things that are going on, especially my daughter's birthday.
So why haven't I written them? Where have I been?
I've been working.
Let me re-state that: I've been working my BUTT off. Spending mornings, nights, weekends and all day working working working. I haven't been keeping up with dishes or laundry, Londo has taken on most of the kid watching responsibilities, and my mom has been helping with drop offs so I can get into work as early as possible.
Sounds a bit crazy, right? It has been. I almost never talk about my work, at least in any detail, but I'm going to just a little now. Move on if you have no interest, but check back soon for stories about my awesome and frustrating kids!
I work in IT, in software development. There are generally two different types of projects if you work in software: new development or operations and maintenance (O&M).
Since having the Pumpkin, I've been on an O&M project. There were regular releases with fixes and enhancements, and there were some long nights and weekend releases. But overall, the project was pretty predictable and and not too hectic, like most O&M projects.
After having the Pookie, I returned to that project in a different role (one I prefer) and to the plan of a redesign of the system. We were going to redo the system, from the back-end coding to the front user interface. I actually prefer new software development to O&M because I find it more exciting and enjoy figuring out how to make the system work for the users.
The thing about new development is that it is really cyclical. In fact the cycle is called the Software Development Lifecycle (SDLC). And even when you plan really well, and even when you have an awesome team, things still get really busy at the end.
Add to that an unexpected shortening of the schedule and a few shifting priorities, and surely you can imagine the craziness that ensues. Which was especially fun while trying to celebrate the Pumpkin's birthday, plan and throw her party, and bake something for her to bring into school for the celebration there.
From this point on, things will still be crazy, but not overwhelmingly so (I HOPE!). Blogging is important to me as both a release and record for where my memory lacks. Reading other blogs is essential in keeping me sane, as well as keeping me in touch with my internet friends. Therefore, I don't plan to have another lengthy hiatus... but I didn't really plan this one either!
But while I was gone, here's a few things I wanted to mention:
-My daughter turned 4!
-Spring has sprung, and I'm feeling so much better.
-The time change never fails to screw up the sleep in my household.
-My daughter's birthday party was a big hit.
-My son's communication has really advanced, even though his pronunciation has not.
-My daughter definitely goes through quarterly regressions, and this current one is (another) killer!
-My son seems to also be in a regression, which just adds to the fun.
-It's just a phase. It's all just a phase. Just a phase...
So it's been a while. How are you doing?
So why haven't I written them? Where have I been?
I've been working.
Let me re-state that: I've been working my BUTT off. Spending mornings, nights, weekends and all day working working working. I haven't been keeping up with dishes or laundry, Londo has taken on most of the kid watching responsibilities, and my mom has been helping with drop offs so I can get into work as early as possible.
Sounds a bit crazy, right? It has been. I almost never talk about my work, at least in any detail, but I'm going to just a little now. Move on if you have no interest, but check back soon for stories about my awesome and frustrating kids!
I work in IT, in software development. There are generally two different types of projects if you work in software: new development or operations and maintenance (O&M).
Since having the Pumpkin, I've been on an O&M project. There were regular releases with fixes and enhancements, and there were some long nights and weekend releases. But overall, the project was pretty predictable and and not too hectic, like most O&M projects.
After having the Pookie, I returned to that project in a different role (one I prefer) and to the plan of a redesign of the system. We were going to redo the system, from the back-end coding to the front user interface. I actually prefer new software development to O&M because I find it more exciting and enjoy figuring out how to make the system work for the users.
The thing about new development is that it is really cyclical. In fact the cycle is called the Software Development Lifecycle (SDLC). And even when you plan really well, and even when you have an awesome team, things still get really busy at the end.
Add to that an unexpected shortening of the schedule and a few shifting priorities, and surely you can imagine the craziness that ensues. Which was especially fun while trying to celebrate the Pumpkin's birthday, plan and throw her party, and bake something for her to bring into school for the celebration there.
From this point on, things will still be crazy, but not overwhelmingly so (I HOPE!). Blogging is important to me as both a release and record for where my memory lacks. Reading other blogs is essential in keeping me sane, as well as keeping me in touch with my internet friends. Therefore, I don't plan to have another lengthy hiatus... but I didn't really plan this one either!
But while I was gone, here's a few things I wanted to mention:
-My daughter turned 4!
-Spring has sprung, and I'm feeling so much better.
-The time change never fails to screw up the sleep in my household.
-My daughter's birthday party was a big hit.
-My son's communication has really advanced, even though his pronunciation has not.
-My daughter definitely goes through quarterly regressions, and this current one is (another) killer!
-My son seems to also be in a regression, which just adds to the fun.
-It's just a phase. It's all just a phase. Just a phase...
So it's been a while. How are you doing?
Wednesday, March 2, 2011
In Love with a Boy
I always knew I would love having a daughter. Being one of those females that was part girly-girl (loved pink, dressing up and Barbies) and part tomboy (loved climbing trees, playing superheros and watching football), I figured that I would be able to connect with my daughter no matter what she liked to do. Plus, there were cute dresses and unicorns and dollhouses that we'd get her!
But having a son? That made me a bit nervous. Not a lot nervous, because I have always loved hanging out with the guys. But a bit nervous because everyone said that they are full of energy, are so physical and not as emotionally sensitive as girls. After having my daughter who is full of energy and very physical, I became less nervous still. But it didn't change the fact that I wasn't sure just how I'd feel about having a boy.
I didn't realize was just how much I would love having a son.
I knew I would love him and that I would even enjoy raising a boy. But I just didn't know how much. Because I am loving it, and him, SO VERY MUCH!
My mom told me that having a boy is like having a little boyfriend. You've got this little guy to cuddle and kiss, a little man to go with you to the store or park or wherever, a guy who's face lights up when he sees you.
But I find I'm much more forgiving to my son that I would be to a boyfriend. For instance, I laugh when the Pookie sticks his hands down my shirt or nuzzles my breasts, even if we are around other people. That would not have been okay for a boyfriend. Or the fact that I think it's funny that he sticks his hands down his pants (except during teething phases when I know his hands will shortly be going in his mouth--that's when we make sure he's got a onsie on). The only other time I thought that was funny was when Al Bundy would do it on Married with Children.
Although my little guy LOVES my breasts and thinks nothing of sticking his hands in his diaper, I think the world of him. And to put modesty aside, I know he thinks the world of me. Without my doing anything specific (or perhaps it's more honest to say doing anything different from what I did with the Pumpkin), the Pookie is a mama's boy. And I'm loving every second of it!
But having a son? That made me a bit nervous. Not a lot nervous, because I have always loved hanging out with the guys. But a bit nervous because everyone said that they are full of energy, are so physical and not as emotionally sensitive as girls. After having my daughter who is full of energy and very physical, I became less nervous still. But it didn't change the fact that I wasn't sure just how I'd feel about having a boy.
I didn't realize was just how much I would love having a son.
I knew I would love him and that I would even enjoy raising a boy. But I just didn't know how much. Because I am loving it, and him, SO VERY MUCH!
My mom told me that having a boy is like having a little boyfriend. You've got this little guy to cuddle and kiss, a little man to go with you to the store or park or wherever, a guy who's face lights up when he sees you.
But I find I'm much more forgiving to my son that I would be to a boyfriend. For instance, I laugh when the Pookie sticks his hands down my shirt or nuzzles my breasts, even if we are around other people. That would not have been okay for a boyfriend. Or the fact that I think it's funny that he sticks his hands down his pants (except during teething phases when I know his hands will shortly be going in his mouth--that's when we make sure he's got a onsie on). The only other time I thought that was funny was when Al Bundy would do it on Married with Children.
Although my little guy LOVES my breasts and thinks nothing of sticking his hands in his diaper, I think the world of him. And to put modesty aside, I know he thinks the world of me. Without my doing anything specific (or perhaps it's more honest to say doing anything different from what I did with the Pumpkin), the Pookie is a mama's boy. And I'm loving every second of it!
Monday, February 28, 2011
Question of the Week - Birthday Party Themes
Well, I didn't mean to disappear for a week. Sorry about that. Work is just crazy busy right now. In the little spare time I had from work, kids and sleep, I spent reading books.
Between the two books for my two book clubs this month, I tried to slip in another book. I wanted it to be one I'd already bought, heard good things about and had been waiting to read. My mistake was trying to slip in book 1 of a trilogy. I loved The Hunger Games, by Suzanne Collins, so much that I immediately had to read the next two books (Catching Fire and Mockingjay)! Though I read them fast, I still had to finish my next book club book, which was another amazing book called The Forgotten Garden, by Kate Morton.
So basically I've spent every spare second with my nose glued to my Nook. (I love my Nook!)
The biggest problem I'm now having isn't even catching up on all the wonderful blogs I read or even writing down the millions of things I want to post about. It's planning my daughter's 4th birthday party.
In a little less than 2 weeks, we will be having her birthday party at our house. It will be a family party, so no huge event planning is needed. But we have had the hardest time coming up with a theme. Last year, we did an Arts and Crafts Party, and it was really awesome. I want to come up with something as fun and cool as that. I think I finally might have a good one, but I need to run it by Londo before announcing.
So I've spent a lot of time lately thinking back to the party themes I had for my birthdays growing up. Which brings us to this week's Question of the Week:
What were some of the best themes you had for your birthday parties growing up?
I have a July birthday, so I had a pool party at least one year. I also had a roller skating party. One year my brother and sister took a clown class and came to my party as clowns, which was so fun. But I think my favorite theme was a costume party, which I did for at least two birthdays. (Is it any surprise that I love throwing Halloween parties?)
What about you guys? Weren't parties different back when we were young? What themes did you have at your parties? What was your favorite birthday party?
Between the two books for my two book clubs this month, I tried to slip in another book. I wanted it to be one I'd already bought, heard good things about and had been waiting to read. My mistake was trying to slip in book 1 of a trilogy. I loved The Hunger Games, by Suzanne Collins, so much that I immediately had to read the next two books (Catching Fire and Mockingjay)! Though I read them fast, I still had to finish my next book club book, which was another amazing book called The Forgotten Garden, by Kate Morton.
So basically I've spent every spare second with my nose glued to my Nook. (I love my Nook!)
The biggest problem I'm now having isn't even catching up on all the wonderful blogs I read or even writing down the millions of things I want to post about. It's planning my daughter's 4th birthday party.
In a little less than 2 weeks, we will be having her birthday party at our house. It will be a family party, so no huge event planning is needed. But we have had the hardest time coming up with a theme. Last year, we did an Arts and Crafts Party, and it was really awesome. I want to come up with something as fun and cool as that. I think I finally might have a good one, but I need to run it by Londo before announcing.
So I've spent a lot of time lately thinking back to the party themes I had for my birthdays growing up. Which brings us to this week's Question of the Week:
What were some of the best themes you had for your birthday parties growing up?
I have a July birthday, so I had a pool party at least one year. I also had a roller skating party. One year my brother and sister took a clown class and came to my party as clowns, which was so fun. But I think my favorite theme was a costume party, which I did for at least two birthdays. (Is it any surprise that I love throwing Halloween parties?)
What about you guys? Weren't parties different back when we were young? What themes did you have at your parties? What was your favorite birthday party?
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