Halloween is my favorite holiday, and since having kids of my own, it's gotten even more fun for me. I don't yet have the time or energy or belief in the consistency of 3.5 year old choice to make costumes for the kids myself, but I do plan on that in the future. For now, we've bought costumes, Londo has put out the outdoor decorations, I've ordered peanut-free candy which has arrived, and we've already done one set of trick-or-treating!
This past Friday, the Pookie's daycare had "trunk or treat" in which a bunch of parents decorated the trunks of their cars, lined them up in the parking lot and handed out candy to the kids who went around trunk-or-treating. The daycare is a nut-free school, so we felt relatively safe letting the Pumpkin go trunk-or-treating with her brother (although not all parents were thorough about the no nuts, included one parent having Reese's Peanutbutter Cups in their bag of candy to hand out! URG!). And the daycare/school didn't mind at all, especially since that is where the Pumpkin went over the summer, so all the teachers and administrative types know her.
I informed Londo that I had signed us up to be one of the cars at trunk or treat and that we were using his car, since his interior is black. Besides, he's the one who does, oh, 90% of all the holiday decorating at our house (that pesky Seasonal Affective Disorder continuously gets in the way of my energy to decorate). Luckily, I long ago infected him with my love of Halloween, and he was on board.
He did a totally awesome job decorating the trunk of our car with all sorts of spooky-but-not-scary Halloween decor, including layering the bottom with orange and black balloons, which all the kids loved. He also played our Halloween playlist through the car speakers, which was a nice touch.
Our kids had so much fun walking around from car to car looking at all the decorations and taking the candy and putting it into their pumpkin buckets. My daughter was a unicorn, and my son was a dragon (although it was a dinosaur costume, it was close enough to call him a dragon). Londo mostly stayed at the car and handed out safe candy. I got to walk hand in hand with my unicorn and dragon and help them pick out the candy, making sure we got lots that Mommy and Daddy like. Heh heh.
I thought the trunk or treat was such a neat idea! We hadn't heard of it before, so it was new and fun for us on my favorite holiday. And this week's question of the week is:
What kind of fun activities do you or your kids' daycares/schools do for Halloween or the Fall season?
My daughter's school doesn't have them dress up for Halloween. But instead, this Friday her after-school care class is doing a Silly Hat Parade! This is another neat idea I hadn't heard of before and can totally get into.
Yesterday, the Pumpkin and I had over a friend and her mom, and we made silly hats out of paper bags. I'd seen the idea before, and then found this website with simple directions. I got some paper grocery bags, pulled out the arts and crafts, including sponge paint and hot glue gun, and we made some awesome hats! I'll try to post pictures soon.
Not only did we have fun making the crafts (my daughter LOVES arts and crafts projects), but she has a beautiful hat to wear on Friday. And for once, I'm not scrambling last minute to get her ready for something at school! I may get the hang of this parenting thing before the kids are completely grown up!
What about you guys? Whacha doing for Halloween or the Fall or as silly artsy projects? Anything good going on at your kids' schools or daycare? Are you planning any good Halloween kids parties in the neighborhood? What's your Halloween fun this year?
Showing posts with label daycare. Show all posts
Showing posts with label daycare. Show all posts
Monday, October 25, 2010
Thursday, July 1, 2010
Big Changes in Our Childcare
Londo and I are still working out the resolution to yesterday's Question of the Week/You Be the Parent. Keep commenting away, as we are getting a lot of great ideas and others are too! When we figure out what we're going to do and see how it works, I'll post a resolution.
In addition to the normal chaos of having a 3 year old and a 1 year old, there are some serious changes in our childcare situation over the last week. We've spent months of debating about what would be best for our children, and we have decided the following:
1. The Pookie started in a daycare yesterday. He's turned 1, and this makes the most sense for all of us right now.
2. The Pumpkin is going to "summer school" at the same place where the Pookie is going to daycare, and she started on Monday.
3. The Pumpkin will start in a Montessori school this fall. (I'd start her earlier, but the school is closed from mid-July to the end of August, so there was no point.)
1. The Pookie started at a really nice daycare that I think I'll be very happy with. We let the nanny go. I'm so incredibly sad, since she has really become part of the family. She watched the Pumpkin since she was 3 months old, a few hours every afternoon the first year of her life, and then all day as her nanny for the second year of her life. She's so wonderful with our kids, our dog and cat, our house and us. We gave a glowing recommendation to the family she is interviewing with. We wish we could keep her, but we simply can't afford to have a nanny anymore. To be quite honest, we never could. But we stretched past our means because we felt it was the right thing to do for our kids and their needs.
The Pumpkin was not ready to go to a daycare at 1. She needed more focus, more individualized care, a home environment and one-on-one attention. By 2, she was ready for more activity and more socialization. And just after she turned 2, we had the Pookie, so the nanny stayed with us.
But the Pookie... He is more laid back, less needy and fussy. He has just started to walk, so he is extra clingy (to me especially) lately, but overall does really well around other kids and grown-ups. As a second child, he is very used to having another kid around and having to wait for things. At 1, he is ready for daycare and will do fine.
2. The Pumpkin still needs a lot of focus and attention. Besides being unhappy with the turnover rate of teachers and lack of follow up about the bullying incident even after my talk with the director, I have been frustrated with the lack of general communication from the administration. My daughter needs time to get used to transitions, which means we need to KNOW about upcoming transitions. Like when one of her favorite teachers (she has two favorites) is moved to another room or the majority of the kids in her class are moved to the next class up at the beginning of summer. TELL US what's going on before it happens! Or heck, even after it happens!
The Pumpkin has been acting out lately, and I honestly believe that part of the reason is because of all these transitions which we had no ability to prep for. One day last week? When I dropped my child off? I knew 3 other kids in her class of 25 and NONE of the teachers there! Granted it was a weird day with one teacher on vacation, another one home with a sick kid and the other moved to another room (which she told me about herself, not the admin office). I called after I left to ask what was going on and the front desk woman said that she put out a note explaining... which I didn't get... cause it was on the door... which I didn't see... oh, because she put it up AFTER I dropped my daughter off. I was the last parent to drop my kid off. So how helpful was that?
Anyway, I was so frustrated that I called up the place where the Pookie was going to start daycare. They have a pre-school programs, fun summer activities and a spot available for a 3 year old. We did a trial free day on Monday, and then just kept her there. Yes, we're losing our deposit at the old school, but it's way better for her. And though I was kind of concerned about the sudden transition, I realized that her school was already transitioning her without our involvement by changing the kids and teachers around. I didn't think there was really anything to lose there. And she'd already visited the place when we checked it out for the Pookie.
For the summer, the class she's in has around 8 kids with one teacher. Instead of three teachers doing "crowd control" (my sister's term for the same situation at the affiliated school to the Pumpkin's old school, where my niece used to go), this teacher is able to really see what's going on in the classroom. Without the extra chaos of so many 3 year olds, the Pumpkin seems to be settling down and settling in really quickly and well. And she's having a blast doing the summer activities, like water play and digging through sand for gems!
Plus, one drop off! And the ability to check on both kids at once!
3. Although the Pumpkin seems to be doing well at her summer school, we are going to switch her to a Montessori school this fall. Having looked into different types of preschools, I really believe the Montessori method and this particular school will be the right fit for her. Although the classes will be larger than this summer class and there are mixed ages, they promote the idea of the older kids as leaders who help the younger kids and the kids don't sit around waiting for teachers to direct them in everything. The kids take the lead in what they want to do, with the teachers assisting and guiding. The materials are all very hands-on, which is ideal for my girl.
The school has a real school administration who run things efficiently, communicate and remember what you tell them, and are willing to work with you on any issues. Apparently, those are things that I need in a school. They also have a few options for pickup times, so we can get the Pumpkin by 4:30 and are paying only up till 4:30, as opposed to the price of an all day pre-school/daycare which we've been paying even though Londo usually picks her up before 4:00. (This earlier pickup option is how we can afford the school at all.)
The only negative that I can see so far is that they require tuition payments 2 months prior to the start of school, plus a hefty enrollment fee. So we are paying for three schools for our two children in July and August! There go our savings!
A huge plus is that the Pookie can start there after he turns 18 months, so we've enrolled him for January 2011. He will be in the 18 mo/2 yo toddler room, which cost less than the daycare because it's a mixed age group with 2 year olds. So even if I love his daycare as much as I think I will, I suspect the drop in costs, the sibling discount and going back to one drop off will be worth the switch. I sure hope so, because that hefty enrollment fee I paid to hold his spot is non-refundable!
So we are currently house-poor (still! Thanks, housing-market crash!) and childcare-completely-broke. But I feel really good about these changes. Hopefully, my kids do too.
In addition to the normal chaos of having a 3 year old and a 1 year old, there are some serious changes in our childcare situation over the last week. We've spent months of debating about what would be best for our children, and we have decided the following:
1. The Pookie started in a daycare yesterday. He's turned 1, and this makes the most sense for all of us right now.
2. The Pumpkin is going to "summer school" at the same place where the Pookie is going to daycare, and she started on Monday.
3. The Pumpkin will start in a Montessori school this fall. (I'd start her earlier, but the school is closed from mid-July to the end of August, so there was no point.)
1. The Pookie started at a really nice daycare that I think I'll be very happy with. We let the nanny go. I'm so incredibly sad, since she has really become part of the family. She watched the Pumpkin since she was 3 months old, a few hours every afternoon the first year of her life, and then all day as her nanny for the second year of her life. She's so wonderful with our kids, our dog and cat, our house and us. We gave a glowing recommendation to the family she is interviewing with. We wish we could keep her, but we simply can't afford to have a nanny anymore. To be quite honest, we never could. But we stretched past our means because we felt it was the right thing to do for our kids and their needs.
The Pumpkin was not ready to go to a daycare at 1. She needed more focus, more individualized care, a home environment and one-on-one attention. By 2, she was ready for more activity and more socialization. And just after she turned 2, we had the Pookie, so the nanny stayed with us.
But the Pookie... He is more laid back, less needy and fussy. He has just started to walk, so he is extra clingy (to me especially) lately, but overall does really well around other kids and grown-ups. As a second child, he is very used to having another kid around and having to wait for things. At 1, he is ready for daycare and will do fine.
2. The Pumpkin still needs a lot of focus and attention. Besides being unhappy with the turnover rate of teachers and lack of follow up about the bullying incident even after my talk with the director, I have been frustrated with the lack of general communication from the administration. My daughter needs time to get used to transitions, which means we need to KNOW about upcoming transitions. Like when one of her favorite teachers (she has two favorites) is moved to another room or the majority of the kids in her class are moved to the next class up at the beginning of summer. TELL US what's going on before it happens! Or heck, even after it happens!
The Pumpkin has been acting out lately, and I honestly believe that part of the reason is because of all these transitions which we had no ability to prep for. One day last week? When I dropped my child off? I knew 3 other kids in her class of 25 and NONE of the teachers there! Granted it was a weird day with one teacher on vacation, another one home with a sick kid and the other moved to another room (which she told me about herself, not the admin office). I called after I left to ask what was going on and the front desk woman said that she put out a note explaining... which I didn't get... cause it was on the door... which I didn't see... oh, because she put it up AFTER I dropped my daughter off. I was the last parent to drop my kid off. So how helpful was that?
Anyway, I was so frustrated that I called up the place where the Pookie was going to start daycare. They have a pre-school programs, fun summer activities and a spot available for a 3 year old. We did a trial free day on Monday, and then just kept her there. Yes, we're losing our deposit at the old school, but it's way better for her. And though I was kind of concerned about the sudden transition, I realized that her school was already transitioning her without our involvement by changing the kids and teachers around. I didn't think there was really anything to lose there. And she'd already visited the place when we checked it out for the Pookie.
For the summer, the class she's in has around 8 kids with one teacher. Instead of three teachers doing "crowd control" (my sister's term for the same situation at the affiliated school to the Pumpkin's old school, where my niece used to go), this teacher is able to really see what's going on in the classroom. Without the extra chaos of so many 3 year olds, the Pumpkin seems to be settling down and settling in really quickly and well. And she's having a blast doing the summer activities, like water play and digging through sand for gems!
Plus, one drop off! And the ability to check on both kids at once!
3. Although the Pumpkin seems to be doing well at her summer school, we are going to switch her to a Montessori school this fall. Having looked into different types of preschools, I really believe the Montessori method and this particular school will be the right fit for her. Although the classes will be larger than this summer class and there are mixed ages, they promote the idea of the older kids as leaders who help the younger kids and the kids don't sit around waiting for teachers to direct them in everything. The kids take the lead in what they want to do, with the teachers assisting and guiding. The materials are all very hands-on, which is ideal for my girl.
The school has a real school administration who run things efficiently, communicate and remember what you tell them, and are willing to work with you on any issues. Apparently, those are things that I need in a school. They also have a few options for pickup times, so we can get the Pumpkin by 4:30 and are paying only up till 4:30, as opposed to the price of an all day pre-school/daycare which we've been paying even though Londo usually picks her up before 4:00. (This earlier pickup option is how we can afford the school at all.)
The only negative that I can see so far is that they require tuition payments 2 months prior to the start of school, plus a hefty enrollment fee. So we are paying for three schools for our two children in July and August! There go our savings!
A huge plus is that the Pookie can start there after he turns 18 months, so we've enrolled him for January 2011. He will be in the 18 mo/2 yo toddler room, which cost less than the daycare because it's a mixed age group with 2 year olds. So even if I love his daycare as much as I think I will, I suspect the drop in costs, the sibling discount and going back to one drop off will be worth the switch. I sure hope so, because that hefty enrollment fee I paid to hold his spot is non-refundable!
So we are currently house-poor (still! Thanks, housing-market crash!) and childcare-completely-broke. But I feel really good about these changes. Hopefully, my kids do too.
Wednesday, June 23, 2010
Step By Step
Now that my little baby has turned a year, there are just so many changes in his life--the changes from within (developmental and growth) and the changes from without (by us parents and others).
Today, I dropped both kids off at daycare/pre-school for the first time. It won't be the last, as we are making changing to our childcare situations. In fact, the Pookie had a "free trail" day at the daycare where we are starting him full time next Wednesday. The Pumpkin will continue at her pre-school (a different location) through the summer, and then we are going to start her at a Montessori school in the fall (as long as they have room and are a fit for her! I'm feeling anxious to here back from them). He apparently did great, which is such a relieve even if it's no surprise.
The Pooki's a pretty easy-going guy, loves people and people-watching, and is very flexible with changes to his schedule and environment. The good news about starting him at daycare is that he seems ready for it and like he will enjoy it, and that the place I found (after MUCH searching) is also flexible and care more about the children's individual needs than getting them on their schedule or agenda.
He is starting in the 12-18 month room, where most of the kids are walking, eating real foods and taking one nap a day. He's not really walking yet (more in paragraphs below), but he is close and will do just fine in the room. He did fine with the one nap, as he has before when we were on vacation or sometimes when he just won't take the other nap. We think he's about to transition to one nap anyway, and we'll just get him back on an earlier bedtime. But he didn't eat the real food that was provided. He did eat up all the rice cereal and purees I packed for him. He didn't drink milk out of the sippy cup, but did suck down the bottles. He's not doing everything that other kids are in the room, but he'll get there little by little. Baby steps, if needed.
Speaking of steps: the Pookie took his first unassisted step last Friday! I didn't see it, but I saw him take one on Saturday and Londo said that he did the exact same the evening before. So we're calling it last Friday. His wobbly steps and even his failed attempts are so freaking cute! He's standing up without touching anything, he's cruising all around, and he's walking with assistance like a champ. He'll soon be able to trail after his sister on two feet instead of hands and knees.
Another new development has been his ability to figure out what steps he needs to take to accomplish things. I believe The Wonder Weeks calls it the World of Sequence. Sunday night while Londo was putting the Pumpkin to bed, I was playing downstairs with the Pookie. This was nice, because I rarely get one-on-one time with him just to play. I'm usually either with both kids, or when I'm with just him, I'm nursing him, putting him to bed or getting him ready for the day.
We had a cup between us, and we were putting plastic balls into the cup and taking them out. I was amazed watching him pick up a ball, look at the cup, put it in, and then get another ball to do the same. Once it was full, he would push the cup over so they rolled out, and he would start again (once I rightened the cup). I pulled over a bucket, and he started putting some balls in that one. He would look at the ball, look at the cup, look at the bucket and I could see him decide which he wanted! And then he'd put the ball where he wanted it.
Also, he would hand me some balls to do the same. And my favorite moment of that playtime was when he was handing me balls, but I had my hand so my palm was face down. He reached with his free hand, turned my hand over, and then placed the ball in my hand!
A year ago, he was a lump of broccoli. Now he is figuring out where he wants things and what he needs to do to get them there! My little guy is growing up!
Today, I dropped both kids off at daycare/pre-school for the first time. It won't be the last, as we are making changing to our childcare situations. In fact, the Pookie had a "free trail" day at the daycare where we are starting him full time next Wednesday. The Pumpkin will continue at her pre-school (a different location) through the summer, and then we are going to start her at a Montessori school in the fall (as long as they have room and are a fit for her! I'm feeling anxious to here back from them). He apparently did great, which is such a relieve even if it's no surprise.
The Pooki's a pretty easy-going guy, loves people and people-watching, and is very flexible with changes to his schedule and environment. The good news about starting him at daycare is that he seems ready for it and like he will enjoy it, and that the place I found (after MUCH searching) is also flexible and care more about the children's individual needs than getting them on their schedule or agenda.
He is starting in the 12-18 month room, where most of the kids are walking, eating real foods and taking one nap a day. He's not really walking yet (more in paragraphs below), but he is close and will do just fine in the room. He did fine with the one nap, as he has before when we were on vacation or sometimes when he just won't take the other nap. We think he's about to transition to one nap anyway, and we'll just get him back on an earlier bedtime. But he didn't eat the real food that was provided. He did eat up all the rice cereal and purees I packed for him. He didn't drink milk out of the sippy cup, but did suck down the bottles. He's not doing everything that other kids are in the room, but he'll get there little by little. Baby steps, if needed.
Speaking of steps: the Pookie took his first unassisted step last Friday! I didn't see it, but I saw him take one on Saturday and Londo said that he did the exact same the evening before. So we're calling it last Friday. His wobbly steps and even his failed attempts are so freaking cute! He's standing up without touching anything, he's cruising all around, and he's walking with assistance like a champ. He'll soon be able to trail after his sister on two feet instead of hands and knees.
Another new development has been his ability to figure out what steps he needs to take to accomplish things. I believe The Wonder Weeks calls it the World of Sequence. Sunday night while Londo was putting the Pumpkin to bed, I was playing downstairs with the Pookie. This was nice, because I rarely get one-on-one time with him just to play. I'm usually either with both kids, or when I'm with just him, I'm nursing him, putting him to bed or getting him ready for the day.
We had a cup between us, and we were putting plastic balls into the cup and taking them out. I was amazed watching him pick up a ball, look at the cup, put it in, and then get another ball to do the same. Once it was full, he would push the cup over so they rolled out, and he would start again (once I rightened the cup). I pulled over a bucket, and he started putting some balls in that one. He would look at the ball, look at the cup, look at the bucket and I could see him decide which he wanted! And then he'd put the ball where he wanted it.
Also, he would hand me some balls to do the same. And my favorite moment of that playtime was when he was handing me balls, but I had my hand so my palm was face down. He reached with his free hand, turned my hand over, and then placed the ball in my hand!
A year ago, he was a lump of broccoli. Now he is figuring out where he wants things and what he needs to do to get them there! My little guy is growing up!
Friday, September 25, 2009
Mom Purse Coming to the Rescue!
I went to the outlets last month to buy fall clothes for the Pumpkin and much needed clothes for the Pookie. I got myself underwear--nothing fun or pretty, just big panties that don't rest on my incision/scar. The one fun thing I got for myself was a purse. I found it at Nine West and picked it for it's pattern and material. It's really cute.
The issues I had were that there was only one inside pocket (and no outside pocket) and it was maybe a medium-sized purse. I usually like smaller purses, because I will fill bigger purses up with crap that I don't really need in my purse. Also, between the size and lack of pockets, I had a feeling I would lose things in it and have to search for anything I needed. Of course, those things have come true. But it might not be all bad anymore.
As I was searching for my phone in the depths of the purse the other day, I was laughing at what was in there. In addition to my necessary and unnecessary items for myself, I also have some of the Pumpkin's things. There is a to-go applesauce I stuck in there on my way out of the house for our car trip last weekend (along with a box of raisins which have already been eaten). There is a pink ponytail holder that she pulled out of her hair in the car and I didn't want to lose. And there was a slinky that she wouldn't leave behind at home one day when we were going to the car to go to pre-school the other day, but she forgot about after she got in her carseat.
When we got to her pre-school today, the teacher asked her what toy she brought in for Show and Share day. Well, she had been out the previous two Fridays (for the funeral trip and before that because she was sick) and I hadn't read the note that came home yesterday, so I had forgotten that they do Show and Share on Fridays. I looked at the teacher and said we forgot. The teacher made a that's-too-bad look but said she could go look at what the other kids brought in.
And then I remembered what was in my Mom Purse! I had her slinky! A toy she loves! So I told the teacher I had something and pulled it out of my purse. The Pumpkin looked so happy. She loves that toy, and she had something to Show and Share.
I was totally reminded of the movie One Fine Day (remember that movie with George Clooney and Michelle Pfeiffer?) when Michelle Pfeiffer's character pulls all sorts of stuff out of her purse to dress the kids up so they could be in costumes like the other kids at the daycare. I'm not quite to Mary Poppins' carpet bag's level of holding things, but no one can compare to Mary Poppins.
Who needs Deigo's Rescue Pack when you have a Mom Purse? I'm sure I'll collect even more as the weeks and months go by, and it'll be better than Dora's Backpack. I may never get to use a small purse again, but it's totally worth it when I can save the day with what's in my big ole Mom Purse.
The issues I had were that there was only one inside pocket (and no outside pocket) and it was maybe a medium-sized purse. I usually like smaller purses, because I will fill bigger purses up with crap that I don't really need in my purse. Also, between the size and lack of pockets, I had a feeling I would lose things in it and have to search for anything I needed. Of course, those things have come true. But it might not be all bad anymore.
As I was searching for my phone in the depths of the purse the other day, I was laughing at what was in there. In addition to my necessary and unnecessary items for myself, I also have some of the Pumpkin's things. There is a to-go applesauce I stuck in there on my way out of the house for our car trip last weekend (along with a box of raisins which have already been eaten). There is a pink ponytail holder that she pulled out of her hair in the car and I didn't want to lose. And there was a slinky that she wouldn't leave behind at home one day when we were going to the car to go to pre-school the other day, but she forgot about after she got in her carseat.
When we got to her pre-school today, the teacher asked her what toy she brought in for Show and Share day. Well, she had been out the previous two Fridays (for the funeral trip and before that because she was sick) and I hadn't read the note that came home yesterday, so I had forgotten that they do Show and Share on Fridays. I looked at the teacher and said we forgot. The teacher made a that's-too-bad look but said she could go look at what the other kids brought in.
And then I remembered what was in my Mom Purse! I had her slinky! A toy she loves! So I told the teacher I had something and pulled it out of my purse. The Pumpkin looked so happy. She loves that toy, and she had something to Show and Share.
I was totally reminded of the movie One Fine Day (remember that movie with George Clooney and Michelle Pfeiffer?) when Michelle Pfeiffer's character pulls all sorts of stuff out of her purse to dress the kids up so they could be in costumes like the other kids at the daycare. I'm not quite to Mary Poppins' carpet bag's level of holding things, but no one can compare to Mary Poppins.
Who needs Deigo's Rescue Pack when you have a Mom Purse? I'm sure I'll collect even more as the weeks and months go by, and it'll be better than Dora's Backpack. I may never get to use a small purse again, but it's totally worth it when I can save the day with what's in my big ole Mom Purse.
Friday, September 4, 2009
Drop-offs Get Easier Eventually... Right?
The Pumpkin really seems to like school. Each time I've picked her up from school, she has had a good day and talks about the fun things she did. When we are at home and we talk about school, she is happy and has good things to say. She even uses a happy voice to tell me, "I cry!" (She wasn't napping and didn't want to stay on her cot, so she cried.) When I get her ready for school in the morning and even when we get in the car to go to school, she seems excited and happy about it.
Then we get there. Things go downhill quickly.
Monday, she was obviously unsure of what to do and a bit overwhelmed. In the car, I had told her again and again, "When we get to your school, first, we will find your classroom. Then, we will say hi to Miss J. Then, you will get to play with the other kids!" This helped a lot. When we walked in the building, she looked overwhelmed and started hiding behind me, but I turned to her and said, "What do we do first? We find your classroom!" And she marched down the hall with me. Then we said hi to Miss J. And then, I encouraged her to play with the other kids. She didn't leave me right away, but after 5 minutes or so, she pulled off her backpack and jacket, handed them to me, and went off to play.
Tuesday morning, in the car on the way over, I started prompting her, "When we get to your school, first we find your..." She says, "Class room!" I prompt, "And then we say hi to..." "Miss J!" I prompt, "And then you get to play with the... " "Other kids!" That morning, almost as soon as we got in the room, she handed me her stuff and ran off to see what was going on at the table. That was the best morning.
Wednesday morning, she went with me right to the room, took off her backpack and jacket, said hi to her teachers (there is also a Miss K), but didn't want to go to the circle. She clung to me. It was hard. She was upset and fussing/crying a bit. As I tried to get her to go, other kids left the circle to do other things. When she saw another kid playing with the blocks they'd played with the previous day, she grabbed one. There was a brief moment of "Mine/No, mine!" But then I told her to build a tower with the other boy, and she put the block on top and thanked him for "helping." I said bye and left, but she wasn't really paying attention to me anymore.
Thursday, she started clinging and saying she wanted to go home the minute we got into her classroom. She insisted I stay and play with her. I told her I had to go to work. In fact, in the car on the way to school, I had added that after "play with the... other kids." The last thing now is, "And then Mommy has to go to..." "Work." But in the room, she told me she didn't want me to go to work. I had to stay there with her and play. Or she wanted to go home. The whole time, the teacher is trying to get her attention and to get her into the class with the others. I walked the Pumpkin into the room and lead her to the circle of chairs, and Miss J brought out stickers. The Pumpkin loves stickers, so she hurried over to get one. I slipped out. Was it a mistake to slip out rather than make a point of saying goodbye and being sure she knew I was going? I don't know, but I just did it.
This morning, it was even worse. She wouldn't even take off her backpack. It's Show and Share day, so we brought in her doodle pad (she picked it out to bring this morning. She's so cute!), but she didn't want to show the other kids or see what they brought. She wanted to go home. She wanted me to stay. When I said I had to go to work, she said she wanted to go to work. She was sobbing and clinging to me. She wanted to be picked up, or at least hold her hand. I brought her in the room more, hoping to smooth the transition. It might have made things worse--I can't tell. I simply couldn't pull myself from her hands as she sobbed at me. I kept trying all the techniques I could think of, from "I wish I could stay" to "I'm going to put you down now, and then I have to leave." Finally, she let go of me and turned, and I said bye as I hurried to the door. She sobbed after me, following me, but I went. I knew I just had to get out of there so as not to prolong it anymore.
I'm sure she was fine a few minutes later (I'm about to call to be reassured). She has fun there. It's a good place with good teachers. She is resilent and generally a happy kid.
I hear the drop-offs will get easier as she gets used to the new routine. But right now, it's tough. I hate to leave her like that, but I'm not sure what to do to make it better. I'm going to try to just leave as soon as we get in, and get there earlier when other kids are being dropped off. Maybe the weekend will help. Or make it worse. Man, this parenting gig isn't ever simple.
Then we get there. Things go downhill quickly.
Monday, she was obviously unsure of what to do and a bit overwhelmed. In the car, I had told her again and again, "When we get to your school, first, we will find your classroom. Then, we will say hi to Miss J. Then, you will get to play with the other kids!" This helped a lot. When we walked in the building, she looked overwhelmed and started hiding behind me, but I turned to her and said, "What do we do first? We find your classroom!" And she marched down the hall with me. Then we said hi to Miss J. And then, I encouraged her to play with the other kids. She didn't leave me right away, but after 5 minutes or so, she pulled off her backpack and jacket, handed them to me, and went off to play.
Tuesday morning, in the car on the way over, I started prompting her, "When we get to your school, first we find your..." She says, "Class room!" I prompt, "And then we say hi to..." "Miss J!" I prompt, "And then you get to play with the... " "Other kids!" That morning, almost as soon as we got in the room, she handed me her stuff and ran off to see what was going on at the table. That was the best morning.
Wednesday morning, she went with me right to the room, took off her backpack and jacket, said hi to her teachers (there is also a Miss K), but didn't want to go to the circle. She clung to me. It was hard. She was upset and fussing/crying a bit. As I tried to get her to go, other kids left the circle to do other things. When she saw another kid playing with the blocks they'd played with the previous day, she grabbed one. There was a brief moment of "Mine/No, mine!" But then I told her to build a tower with the other boy, and she put the block on top and thanked him for "helping." I said bye and left, but she wasn't really paying attention to me anymore.
Thursday, she started clinging and saying she wanted to go home the minute we got into her classroom. She insisted I stay and play with her. I told her I had to go to work. In fact, in the car on the way to school, I had added that after "play with the... other kids." The last thing now is, "And then Mommy has to go to..." "Work." But in the room, she told me she didn't want me to go to work. I had to stay there with her and play. Or she wanted to go home. The whole time, the teacher is trying to get her attention and to get her into the class with the others. I walked the Pumpkin into the room and lead her to the circle of chairs, and Miss J brought out stickers. The Pumpkin loves stickers, so she hurried over to get one. I slipped out. Was it a mistake to slip out rather than make a point of saying goodbye and being sure she knew I was going? I don't know, but I just did it.
This morning, it was even worse. She wouldn't even take off her backpack. It's Show and Share day, so we brought in her doodle pad (she picked it out to bring this morning. She's so cute!), but she didn't want to show the other kids or see what they brought. She wanted to go home. She wanted me to stay. When I said I had to go to work, she said she wanted to go to work. She was sobbing and clinging to me. She wanted to be picked up, or at least hold her hand. I brought her in the room more, hoping to smooth the transition. It might have made things worse--I can't tell. I simply couldn't pull myself from her hands as she sobbed at me. I kept trying all the techniques I could think of, from "I wish I could stay" to "I'm going to put you down now, and then I have to leave." Finally, she let go of me and turned, and I said bye as I hurried to the door. She sobbed after me, following me, but I went. I knew I just had to get out of there so as not to prolong it anymore.
I'm sure she was fine a few minutes later (I'm about to call to be reassured). She has fun there. It's a good place with good teachers. She is resilent and generally a happy kid.
I hear the drop-offs will get easier as she gets used to the new routine. But right now, it's tough. I hate to leave her like that, but I'm not sure what to do to make it better. I'm going to try to just leave as soon as we get in, and get there earlier when other kids are being dropped off. Maybe the weekend will help. Or make it worse. Man, this parenting gig isn't ever simple.
Tuesday, September 1, 2009
Question of the Week - What's Exciting and New?
This is a CRAZY week here at the caramama household. The Pumpkin had her first day of school yesterday, and it went really well (of course she didn't nap and cried about it and wouldn't stay on her cot, but who's surprised? Other than that, she had a great time and ran right back into the foray this morning.). The nanny is transitioning to the Pookie, and that's going pretty well. I start back at work on Thursday, and am crazy busy trying to get everything in order before I go back. And Londo has had to work extremely long hours, including working over the weekend, on a project that will wrap up sometime this week (thank goodness). And sleep has again gone out the window.
I have much more to say on all these matter, and others, but due to being non-stop busy, having intermittent internet connectivity and only one hand free when I do get on the computer (usually I'm nursing at the time), I will have to write about these things in more detail later.
But I would love to hear what is going on with you all! I can read and click Submit with only one hand free, so answer this week's question of the week in as great detail as you want!
What's exciting and new with you?
Besides love and the Love Boat, certainly there are things exciting and new going on with you all. How's the start of the new school year going for you all? How about your kiddos? Anything new with them? And you? Tell me what's going on.
I have much more to say on all these matter, and others, but due to being non-stop busy, having intermittent internet connectivity and only one hand free when I do get on the computer (usually I'm nursing at the time), I will have to write about these things in more detail later.
But I would love to hear what is going on with you all! I can read and click Submit with only one hand free, so answer this week's question of the week in as great detail as you want!
What's exciting and new with you?
Besides love and the Love Boat, certainly there are things exciting and new going on with you all. How's the start of the new school year going for you all? How about your kiddos? Anything new with them? And you? Tell me what's going on.
Wednesday, May 6, 2009
The Pumpkin is Enrolled in Pre-School!
So, I finally did it. I got the application and enrollment fee into the pre-school we have picked out so the Pumpkin can start in the Fall.
We visited the pre-school back in March and liked it well enough. It's not a Montessori school, but they do have some Montessori activities and educational methods, so at least the Pumpkin will have some exposure to that method. I still really love the Montessori method and school we visited, but to lay it out there, we simply can't afford it. We possibly have somehow made it work if it were just the Pumpkin whose daytime care we had to pay for, but with the boy on the way, there is no way we can afford that school at this time.
But that's okay. Because this school is really nice and extremely convienent, and we think the Pumpkin will do great there.
When we visited, we went on a Friday afternoon and brought the Pumpkin with us (as they recommended). We watched her interact with other kids, run around the room, sit at the table with the other kids to color, and (of course) try to climb everything she could. She tried to climb the chairs stacked up next to the wall and toys that could easily have broken.
It was a two-year-old room, and she has just turned two, but this is a new environment for her. She will need to learn the rules, and the teachers will need to learn her personality. I think this school will not only be a great place for her to experience new things that we don't do at home (like painting and other messy things I don't want to deal with yet), but also a great place for her to learn the structure of schools and the expected behavoir in places like schools.
The Pumpkin is extremely social and vocal, so I'm not worried about that aspect of starting pre-school. She generally adjusts to change well. But she is also clingy and needy and emotional. I've been extremely thankful to have such a wonderful nanny who is about to give the Pumpkin what she needs emotionally, physically and socially. She is always taking the Pumpkin to the playground to meet up with two other nannies with kids around the same age. When it's rainy or too cold, they meet up at each others' houses (including ours). The nanny is able to put the Pumpkin down for naps almost every single day (Londo and I can do so only rarely), and she is so patient and loving with the Pumpkin. (I am concerned about how the Pumpkin will (or won't) nap at the pre-school, but I'm not going to really worry about it until we see how it goes.)
I'm sooooo happy to say that our nanny has agreed to stay on for the boy! She will continue to come over and watch the Pumpkin while I'm home on maternity leave with the boy. Then, when the Pumpkin goes off to pre-school (doesn't that sound so grown up? *sniff*) at the beginning of September, I will head back to work and the nanny will watch the boy.
It all sounds great to me and Londo, and we hope that it goes smoothly. Any tips, advice or words of wisdom are welcome, as always. We know there will be adjustment periods over the next few months, but we believe it will all work out.
We visited the pre-school back in March and liked it well enough. It's not a Montessori school, but they do have some Montessori activities and educational methods, so at least the Pumpkin will have some exposure to that method. I still really love the Montessori method and school we visited, but to lay it out there, we simply can't afford it. We possibly have somehow made it work if it were just the Pumpkin whose daytime care we had to pay for, but with the boy on the way, there is no way we can afford that school at this time.
But that's okay. Because this school is really nice and extremely convienent, and we think the Pumpkin will do great there.
When we visited, we went on a Friday afternoon and brought the Pumpkin with us (as they recommended). We watched her interact with other kids, run around the room, sit at the table with the other kids to color, and (of course) try to climb everything she could. She tried to climb the chairs stacked up next to the wall and toys that could easily have broken.
It was a two-year-old room, and she has just turned two, but this is a new environment for her. She will need to learn the rules, and the teachers will need to learn her personality. I think this school will not only be a great place for her to experience new things that we don't do at home (like painting and other messy things I don't want to deal with yet), but also a great place for her to learn the structure of schools and the expected behavoir in places like schools.
The Pumpkin is extremely social and vocal, so I'm not worried about that aspect of starting pre-school. She generally adjusts to change well. But she is also clingy and needy and emotional. I've been extremely thankful to have such a wonderful nanny who is about to give the Pumpkin what she needs emotionally, physically and socially. She is always taking the Pumpkin to the playground to meet up with two other nannies with kids around the same age. When it's rainy or too cold, they meet up at each others' houses (including ours). The nanny is able to put the Pumpkin down for naps almost every single day (Londo and I can do so only rarely), and she is so patient and loving with the Pumpkin. (I am concerned about how the Pumpkin will (or won't) nap at the pre-school, but I'm not going to really worry about it until we see how it goes.)
I'm sooooo happy to say that our nanny has agreed to stay on for the boy! She will continue to come over and watch the Pumpkin while I'm home on maternity leave with the boy. Then, when the Pumpkin goes off to pre-school (doesn't that sound so grown up? *sniff*) at the beginning of September, I will head back to work and the nanny will watch the boy.
It all sounds great to me and Londo, and we hope that it goes smoothly. Any tips, advice or words of wisdom are welcome, as always. We know there will be adjustment periods over the next few months, but we believe it will all work out.
Friday, May 23, 2008
It's Not All Bad
Thanks everyone for your support. It really helps so much to just hear the sympathy and understanding (including an awesomely funny phone message from limboland la la!). This is a phase, and we will get through it, both at work and at home.
I am inspired by Cloud of Wandering Scientist (see last paragraph of this post). I am going to try to concentrate on the good and wonderful things that the Pumpkin is doing, as well as the things about work that I'm enjoying. So here are some good things that are going in my life.
-----------------------
When the Pumpkin reaches for my glasses (which I wear only when my contacts aren't in), she now get a serious look on her face and says sharply "don", which is of course her imitating me saying "don't". Apparently I say that often when she reaches for my glasses. She obviously does not understand what that word means, because she still reaches for the glasses, tears them off my face and then says "eye" as she tries to poke her finger into my eyeball. (How does she know to do this everytime my hands are occupied with something else?)
Instead of getting mad at her coming close to breaking my glasses as she pulls on them, I find her serious face and sharp "don" extremely funny and I burst out laughing every time. Ah well. It's probably time for new glasses anyway.
------------------------
Londo is now taking one night a week to put the Pumpkin to bed. We made this agreement a while ago, but I think it's been hard for me to let go of this responsibility. For my sanity, I need to take the break at least one night a week, so I've just got to let go and let him do it. He gave her a bottle to bed last night, and I was able to actually spend that time doing something fun for me.
------------------------
Want to know what that something fun was? Yesterday, I finally bought the shelves I talked about a long time ago. I got the drawer base, the cabinet and the cubbies in honey. Last night, I moved the chair from the corner out of the room, set down the drawer base in the corner, and then I put together the cabinet and put it on top of the base. And then... I put away all of the Pumpkin's toys!!! And they all fit in just those, so I can use the cubbies for my cookbooks and other books! Now, instead of the toys overflowing in a corner of the room and a chair in another corner that was just a dumping place for jackets and crap, I've got a beautiful drawer and cabinet that store the Pumpkin's toys in the family room. I'm so happy about that.
And the new couch arrives on Tuesday! As for the other items for the room, I've had to redesign a bit based on the new financial situation. Will try and take pics next week after the couch is in and explain the set up I decided on.
------------------------
Did I mention how much I'm looking forward to the get together at the zoo this weekend?
------------------------
Having the nanny full time at our house has been working out really well. She is wonderful, and having her at our house has really eased my stress in the mornings. If I'm not ready by the time she gets to our house at 8:00, I can hand over the Pumpkin and finish getting ready on my own.
------------------------
A good friend and her daughter (who is a couple months older than the Pumpkin) is very likely going to come to the beach with us on vacation! We own the time share with my parents, so it will be my mom and dad there too. Family, friends, the beach and outlet shopping. Could it get any better???
------------------------
I got an award at work. It comes with money. I can now shop the outlets at the beach without feeling guilty. :-)
------------------------
I finished my May read for the TBR Challenge: Animals in Translation: Using the Mysteries of Autism to Decode Animal Behavior, By Temple Grandin and Catherine Johnson. It was really good, and I'm hoping to write up my review this weekend.
------------------------
The Pumpkin loves to "put things in." So she is picking up stuff from the floor or the alphabet magnets off the fridge and putting them into buckets. Now that I have a good place for her toys, I plan on transitioning her to "put things away." After that, it's only a short jump to dusting and mopping, right?
------------------------
So I've got that going for me, which is nice...
I am inspired by Cloud of Wandering Scientist (see last paragraph of this post). I am going to try to concentrate on the good and wonderful things that the Pumpkin is doing, as well as the things about work that I'm enjoying. So here are some good things that are going in my life.
-----------------------
When the Pumpkin reaches for my glasses (which I wear only when my contacts aren't in), she now get a serious look on her face and says sharply "don", which is of course her imitating me saying "don't". Apparently I say that often when she reaches for my glasses. She obviously does not understand what that word means, because she still reaches for the glasses, tears them off my face and then says "eye" as she tries to poke her finger into my eyeball. (How does she know to do this everytime my hands are occupied with something else?)
Instead of getting mad at her coming close to breaking my glasses as she pulls on them, I find her serious face and sharp "don" extremely funny and I burst out laughing every time. Ah well. It's probably time for new glasses anyway.
------------------------
Londo is now taking one night a week to put the Pumpkin to bed. We made this agreement a while ago, but I think it's been hard for me to let go of this responsibility. For my sanity, I need to take the break at least one night a week, so I've just got to let go and let him do it. He gave her a bottle to bed last night, and I was able to actually spend that time doing something fun for me.
------------------------
Want to know what that something fun was? Yesterday, I finally bought the shelves I talked about a long time ago. I got the drawer base, the cabinet and the cubbies in honey. Last night, I moved the chair from the corner out of the room, set down the drawer base in the corner, and then I put together the cabinet and put it on top of the base. And then... I put away all of the Pumpkin's toys!!! And they all fit in just those, so I can use the cubbies for my cookbooks and other books! Now, instead of the toys overflowing in a corner of the room and a chair in another corner that was just a dumping place for jackets and crap, I've got a beautiful drawer and cabinet that store the Pumpkin's toys in the family room. I'm so happy about that.
And the new couch arrives on Tuesday! As for the other items for the room, I've had to redesign a bit based on the new financial situation. Will try and take pics next week after the couch is in and explain the set up I decided on.
------------------------
Did I mention how much I'm looking forward to the get together at the zoo this weekend?
------------------------
Having the nanny full time at our house has been working out really well. She is wonderful, and having her at our house has really eased my stress in the mornings. If I'm not ready by the time she gets to our house at 8:00, I can hand over the Pumpkin and finish getting ready on my own.
------------------------
A good friend and her daughter (who is a couple months older than the Pumpkin) is very likely going to come to the beach with us on vacation! We own the time share with my parents, so it will be my mom and dad there too. Family, friends, the beach and outlet shopping. Could it get any better???
------------------------
I got an award at work. It comes with money. I can now shop the outlets at the beach without feeling guilty. :-)
------------------------
I finished my May read for the TBR Challenge: Animals in Translation: Using the Mysteries of Autism to Decode Animal Behavior, By Temple Grandin and Catherine Johnson. It was really good, and I'm hoping to write up my review this weekend.
------------------------
The Pumpkin loves to "put things in." So she is picking up stuff from the floor or the alphabet magnets off the fridge and putting them into buckets. Now that I have a good place for her toys, I plan on transitioning her to "put things away." After that, it's only a short jump to dusting and mopping, right?
------------------------
So I've got that going for me, which is nice...
Monday, May 12, 2008
Question of the Week - Caring for the Child
I hope all the mothers out there had a happy Mother's Day. (At least for those who knew it was Mother's Day. hehe. I guess it's not as big a deal in other countries.) For those who are not yet mothers or are still trying to be mothers, I hope next year brings you a lovely Mother's Day filled with all you could have hoped for.
I'm gonna update about my weekend first, and then we'll get to the Question of the Week. Because I haven't complained enough about our lack of sleep. ;-)
My brother needed Londo's help moving on Sunday, so Londo gave me Saturday as a day off from childcare and anything else to enjoy doing whatever I wanted, which included a 2 HOUR NAP!!! and playing around on the computer for the rest of the afternoon. Alas, I still haven't caught up on all the blogs I like to read, but I was working on other things.
Unfortunately, Londo had to deal with a very fussy toddler and he was grumpy on his own anyway. These things kind of twinged my day a bit because I'm the type to feed off of others' emotions, especially those closest to me, and because I felt a bit guilty taking time off (oh that mother's guilt) especially when she has been so fussy.
We knew her second bottom molar was coming in, but by the evening we were starting to think she felt hotter than the slight fever she gets when teething. She hadn't been sleep well for a while (minus that one glorious night after her first molar broke through and she slept through the night), but Saturday night the Pumpkin was miserable. She was so hot and getting shivers. We gave her Motrin and try her in our bed, but she was kicking and flailing so much that no one was getting any sleep. Londo finally got her to sleep in her crib from about 4 to 6, but most of the night was pretty awful for all of us.
The next morning, she seemed fine and didn't seem feverish, just a little warm like she does when she's teething. So we went over to my mom's for a Mother's Day breakfast with my parents, my grandmother, my sister's family, and my brother's family, and we had a really good time. When we brought her back home at morning naptime, she was melting down and feeling miserable. I just held her for her nap and we both napped in the recliner, while Londo went to help my brother move. We napped about 40 minutes, but she woke up still tired and cranky and very clingy. It was kind of nice to have her so clingy and cuddly on Mother's Day, but it was a shame she felt so bad.
She fell back asleep in my arms an hour or two later, after eating very little. I was able to go online and type one handed while she slept on me (sorry to those who got my sloppy comments!). When she woke up again, she was still so groggy and hot. I finally decided to take her temperature rectally (the forehead thermometer just isn't accurate), and it was 104.3!!! That was when I got panicky and called my pediatrician's nurse on call. She made me feel a lot better and we talked about what I was doing to help the Pumpkin: medicine for the fever, liquids, saline swabs for her nose, foods when she'd eat them, keep her cool. I was doing all but keeping her cool enough. So I stripped her down to her onsie and light pants (not even socks) and gave her a couple of ounces of cold milk. After she finished the milk, she popped up, wanted to get down and started running around playing! She did so much better the rest of the evening!
We still had a rough night, and my back, arms and legs are so sore from sleeping in the recliner, but the fever has not seemed to come back. I'm taking her in to the doctor today even though her fever seems gone. She's still fussy and not eating much, but that's how she was with the molar teething before all this. I'll feel better after the doctor checks her out.
The Pumpkin and I didn't wake up from our sleeping in the recliner until 7:00, and then I nursed her for about a half hour, got her dressed and ready, and it was almost 8:00. I still was not ready at all, hadn't even used the bathroom! But the nanny arrives at 8:00 (or shortly after), so I just brought the Pumpkin downstairs and when the nanny got there, I was able to go up and shower and get ready without having to chase around the toddler! It was such a relief because I was running so late (I like to be out the door just after 8:00).
So, this got me thinking... Usually we parents are full of guilt about the choices we make for going back to work or staying home, for sending a kid to daycare or spending money on a nanny, for so many things that seem so important in raising our children. What if we take a minute to say some good things about our childcare situation, whether it be staying at home with the child, having a nanny or family member watch the child or the child getting to go to daycare. So the question of the week is...
What is great about your childcare situation?
Mine is that the one-on-one care for the Pumpkin has been really good for her, and the nanny at our house is making my time getting out the door so much easier. Also, if the baby was this fussy and I was dropping her off at my mom's, I would always feel so bad because she is mom my doing this favor for us, but when it's the nanny I have less guilt about the Pumpkin being fussy because she is watching just her and can devote attention to her when she is fussy and clingy and, let's be honest, because we are paying her I feel like it's her job to watch the Pumpkin through the good and bad. I don't know if that makes sense out loud, but it does in my head.
How about you? What makes you happy about who is caring for your child and how?
I'm gonna update about my weekend first, and then we'll get to the Question of the Week. Because I haven't complained enough about our lack of sleep. ;-)
My brother needed Londo's help moving on Sunday, so Londo gave me Saturday as a day off from childcare and anything else to enjoy doing whatever I wanted, which included a 2 HOUR NAP!!! and playing around on the computer for the rest of the afternoon. Alas, I still haven't caught up on all the blogs I like to read, but I was working on other things.
Unfortunately, Londo had to deal with a very fussy toddler and he was grumpy on his own anyway. These things kind of twinged my day a bit because I'm the type to feed off of others' emotions, especially those closest to me, and because I felt a bit guilty taking time off (oh that mother's guilt) especially when she has been so fussy.
We knew her second bottom molar was coming in, but by the evening we were starting to think she felt hotter than the slight fever she gets when teething. She hadn't been sleep well for a while (minus that one glorious night after her first molar broke through and she slept through the night), but Saturday night the Pumpkin was miserable. She was so hot and getting shivers. We gave her Motrin and try her in our bed, but she was kicking and flailing so much that no one was getting any sleep. Londo finally got her to sleep in her crib from about 4 to 6, but most of the night was pretty awful for all of us.
The next morning, she seemed fine and didn't seem feverish, just a little warm like she does when she's teething. So we went over to my mom's for a Mother's Day breakfast with my parents, my grandmother, my sister's family, and my brother's family, and we had a really good time. When we brought her back home at morning naptime, she was melting down and feeling miserable. I just held her for her nap and we both napped in the recliner, while Londo went to help my brother move. We napped about 40 minutes, but she woke up still tired and cranky and very clingy. It was kind of nice to have her so clingy and cuddly on Mother's Day, but it was a shame she felt so bad.
She fell back asleep in my arms an hour or two later, after eating very little. I was able to go online and type one handed while she slept on me (sorry to those who got my sloppy comments!). When she woke up again, she was still so groggy and hot. I finally decided to take her temperature rectally (the forehead thermometer just isn't accurate), and it was 104.3!!! That was when I got panicky and called my pediatrician's nurse on call. She made me feel a lot better and we talked about what I was doing to help the Pumpkin: medicine for the fever, liquids, saline swabs for her nose, foods when she'd eat them, keep her cool. I was doing all but keeping her cool enough. So I stripped her down to her onsie and light pants (not even socks) and gave her a couple of ounces of cold milk. After she finished the milk, she popped up, wanted to get down and started running around playing! She did so much better the rest of the evening!
We still had a rough night, and my back, arms and legs are so sore from sleeping in the recliner, but the fever has not seemed to come back. I'm taking her in to the doctor today even though her fever seems gone. She's still fussy and not eating much, but that's how she was with the molar teething before all this. I'll feel better after the doctor checks her out.
The Pumpkin and I didn't wake up from our sleeping in the recliner until 7:00, and then I nursed her for about a half hour, got her dressed and ready, and it was almost 8:00. I still was not ready at all, hadn't even used the bathroom! But the nanny arrives at 8:00 (or shortly after), so I just brought the Pumpkin downstairs and when the nanny got there, I was able to go up and shower and get ready without having to chase around the toddler! It was such a relief because I was running so late (I like to be out the door just after 8:00).
So, this got me thinking... Usually we parents are full of guilt about the choices we make for going back to work or staying home, for sending a kid to daycare or spending money on a nanny, for so many things that seem so important in raising our children. What if we take a minute to say some good things about our childcare situation, whether it be staying at home with the child, having a nanny or family member watch the child or the child getting to go to daycare. So the question of the week is...
What is great about your childcare situation?
Mine is that the one-on-one care for the Pumpkin has been really good for her, and the nanny at our house is making my time getting out the door so much easier. Also, if the baby was this fussy and I was dropping her off at my mom's, I would always feel so bad because she is mom my doing this favor for us, but when it's the nanny I have less guilt about the Pumpkin being fussy because she is watching just her and can devote attention to her when she is fussy and clingy and, let's be honest, because we are paying her I feel like it's her job to watch the Pumpkin through the good and bad. I don't know if that makes sense out loud, but it does in my head.
How about you? What makes you happy about who is caring for your child and how?
Friday, May 9, 2008
Things Are Looking Up
In this roller coaster that is life, we are heading back upward. This is in large part due to five things:
1. I adjusted my expectations.
2. The nanny is wonderful, and the one-on-one care is really working out well for the Pumpkin.
3. The dog is fine!!!
4. The Pumpkin's first molar FINALLY poked through.
5. Londo is back home.
Wednesday night, I adjusted my expectations. I wanted to be sure to shower, but I couldn't count on her going to sleep in time for me to do so. So, I took the advice (given to me sometime within the last year) of a good family friend who has five boys, and I showered in the baby's bathroom while the baby* was in the tub! We have a sprayer that we can use instead of the showerhead, and the holder is low enough that I could kneel under it and water would not spray in the Pumpkin's eyes. By kneeling, I was close enough to the baby to be able to interact and wash her up too. She played with her bath toys and kept looking at me laughing. It was silly and fun and we both got clean!
The next expectation I adjusted was how long it would take me to get her to sleep. I went in with the expectation that it would definitely take longer than an hour. And that was okay. I also kept in my head different things to try, but kept returning to nursing, which is usually the way she drifts off to sleep the best. I proud to say that I didn't get frustrated and was able to get her to sleep after 1.5 hours. Not bad, considering the night before it was 3.5! I really think that my frustration the previous night just feed her inability to calm down and go to sleep. So this was much better.
She woke only once, at 3:30. I went in with the expectation that it would probably take an hour, maybe more, to get her back to sleep. And that I would need to walk her around bouncing her. This is the hardest way to calm her down for me, but the easiest and often best way for her. My back, legs and arms were very sore, but I didn't concentrate on that. (Instead, I worked on decorating our family room in my head--it's what I do.) After 45 minutes, I thought she was asleep enough to be put in her crib. But I thought to myself the whole time I was lowering her, "It's okay if she wakes up. It's okay if she wakes up." Luckily, she didn't wake up. But I think I would have been okay if she did.
The next morning, she slept until almost 7:00! We had a good morning, and I was even able to do the final things to get the house ready for the cleaning lady. The nanny has been great, and it's very apparent that the one-on-one care she is getting is really good for her at this particular stage of her development and for her temperment. We are very fortunate that this is all working out.
The dog's surgery went well, and she is recovering well. Best of all, the lump was only a fatty build up, therefore it does not even need to be biopsied! It's definitely not cancerous! As a side bonus, this means the surgery cost less than we were expecting. When I got this news, I felt such a huge relief. I had been trying not to think about it, but my subconscious was apparently worrying more that I was letting myself realize. My poor sweet dog will still have a bit of recovery to do from the surgery, but apparently the growth was so easily removed and the surgery so easy on her body, her recovery should go pretty smoothly. I will keep praying all goes well, though, and not expect it to be an overnight recovery. Adjusting expectations.
Also yesterday, the Pumpkin's first molar broke through and Londo got back in the evening. So last night, the Pumpkin slept through the night! This was especially good for Londo, who was exhausted from his trip. And let's face it, if she had woken, he would have been the one to get her no matter what time of night. Cause I needed the break and there was no changing that expectation!!! Fortunately, she slept until 6:15, and we had another great morning. Dog is doing well. Nanny came over and is fantastic. Londo is taking the day off of work to rest and catch up on household stuff. I'll be able to work late and get more off my plate. I was also able to run errand yesterday evening while hubby watched the kiddo, and then I worked for a couple hours after she was in bed.
So things are looking up, and I'm looking forward to our busy weekend, including a Mother's Day breakfast with my family.
*I'm still calling her a baby! You can't make me stop!
1. I adjusted my expectations.
2. The nanny is wonderful, and the one-on-one care is really working out well for the Pumpkin.
3. The dog is fine!!!
4. The Pumpkin's first molar FINALLY poked through.
5. Londo is back home.
Wednesday night, I adjusted my expectations. I wanted to be sure to shower, but I couldn't count on her going to sleep in time for me to do so. So, I took the advice (given to me sometime within the last year) of a good family friend who has five boys, and I showered in the baby's bathroom while the baby* was in the tub! We have a sprayer that we can use instead of the showerhead, and the holder is low enough that I could kneel under it and water would not spray in the Pumpkin's eyes. By kneeling, I was close enough to the baby to be able to interact and wash her up too. She played with her bath toys and kept looking at me laughing. It was silly and fun and we both got clean!
The next expectation I adjusted was how long it would take me to get her to sleep. I went in with the expectation that it would definitely take longer than an hour. And that was okay. I also kept in my head different things to try, but kept returning to nursing, which is usually the way she drifts off to sleep the best. I proud to say that I didn't get frustrated and was able to get her to sleep after 1.5 hours. Not bad, considering the night before it was 3.5! I really think that my frustration the previous night just feed her inability to calm down and go to sleep. So this was much better.
She woke only once, at 3:30. I went in with the expectation that it would probably take an hour, maybe more, to get her back to sleep. And that I would need to walk her around bouncing her. This is the hardest way to calm her down for me, but the easiest and often best way for her. My back, legs and arms were very sore, but I didn't concentrate on that. (Instead, I worked on decorating our family room in my head--it's what I do.) After 45 minutes, I thought she was asleep enough to be put in her crib. But I thought to myself the whole time I was lowering her, "It's okay if she wakes up. It's okay if she wakes up." Luckily, she didn't wake up. But I think I would have been okay if she did.
The next morning, she slept until almost 7:00! We had a good morning, and I was even able to do the final things to get the house ready for the cleaning lady. The nanny has been great, and it's very apparent that the one-on-one care she is getting is really good for her at this particular stage of her development and for her temperment. We are very fortunate that this is all working out.
The dog's surgery went well, and she is recovering well. Best of all, the lump was only a fatty build up, therefore it does not even need to be biopsied! It's definitely not cancerous! As a side bonus, this means the surgery cost less than we were expecting. When I got this news, I felt such a huge relief. I had been trying not to think about it, but my subconscious was apparently worrying more that I was letting myself realize. My poor sweet dog will still have a bit of recovery to do from the surgery, but apparently the growth was so easily removed and the surgery so easy on her body, her recovery should go pretty smoothly. I will keep praying all goes well, though, and not expect it to be an overnight recovery. Adjusting expectations.
Also yesterday, the Pumpkin's first molar broke through and Londo got back in the evening. So last night, the Pumpkin slept through the night! This was especially good for Londo, who was exhausted from his trip. And let's face it, if she had woken, he would have been the one to get her no matter what time of night. Cause I needed the break and there was no changing that expectation!!! Fortunately, she slept until 6:15, and we had another great morning. Dog is doing well. Nanny came over and is fantastic. Londo is taking the day off of work to rest and catch up on household stuff. I'll be able to work late and get more off my plate. I was also able to run errand yesterday evening while hubby watched the kiddo, and then I worked for a couple hours after she was in bed.
So things are looking up, and I'm looking forward to our busy weekend, including a Mother's Day breakfast with my family.
*I'm still calling her a baby! You can't make me stop!
Tuesday, May 6, 2008
The Few Thoughts I Can Produce
I'm tired. I'm cranky. I'm not getting enough done. And I'm sick of complaining.
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I wanted to write about how that 60-Day Ask Moxie Challenge went (pretty well), but I just can't find the time or energy. I wanted to talk about the new 60-Day Challenge and what I'm doing, but I think I can't do more than list them:
1. Eating 3 servings of fruits/veggies a day.
2. Starting to chart my cycles in mental preparations for when we start trying to conceive.
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Londo left today for a business trip and won't be back until late Thursday. Which will be nice, since the Pumpkin has been extra fussy and up at least 1-2 times a night. I'm really looking forward to the nighttimes all on my own.
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Work is crazy lately, and the next couple of weeks will be especially busy. So if I don't post everyday, you know why.
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Oh! The nanny started at our house full time with one-on-one care for the Pumpkin yesterday. So far (1.5 days in), it's going really well! Most importantly, Londo and I feel really good about this decision.
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I'm taking my dog to the vet to have a lump removed tomorrow. I'm really nervous about it because the last time we had three lumps removed, and one had cancerous cells. It's like skin cancer, though, in that it didn't spread through her system, we caught it early and had it removed, and we are supposed to watch for more lumps. Like we one we found and has gotten bigger. So it will be removed and sent off for testing. I'm trying not to think about what that could mean, so only cheerful responses on this, k?
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I have not been able to keep up with my blog reading lately. Too much going on at work and home. I'm hoping that with Londo out of town, I will have times in the evening to catch up after baby goes to bed, but I might be so exhausted that I have to go to bed by 8:30. We'll see. But I miss knowing how everyone is doing, so I'll catch up soon.
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I wanted to write about how that 60-Day Ask Moxie Challenge went (pretty well), but I just can't find the time or energy. I wanted to talk about the new 60-Day Challenge and what I'm doing, but I think I can't do more than list them:
1. Eating 3 servings of fruits/veggies a day.
2. Starting to chart my cycles in mental preparations for when we start trying to conceive.
-------------------
Londo left today for a business trip and won't be back until late Thursday. Which will be nice, since the Pumpkin has been extra fussy and up at least 1-2 times a night. I'm really looking forward to the nighttimes all on my own.
-------------------
Work is crazy lately, and the next couple of weeks will be especially busy. So if I don't post everyday, you know why.
-------------------
Oh! The nanny started at our house full time with one-on-one care for the Pumpkin yesterday. So far (1.5 days in), it's going really well! Most importantly, Londo and I feel really good about this decision.
-------------------
I'm taking my dog to the vet to have a lump removed tomorrow. I'm really nervous about it because the last time we had three lumps removed, and one had cancerous cells. It's like skin cancer, though, in that it didn't spread through her system, we caught it early and had it removed, and we are supposed to watch for more lumps. Like we one we found and has gotten bigger. So it will be removed and sent off for testing. I'm trying not to think about what that could mean, so only cheerful responses on this, k?
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I have not been able to keep up with my blog reading lately. Too much going on at work and home. I'm hoping that with Londo out of town, I will have times in the evening to catch up after baby goes to bed, but I might be so exhausted that I have to go to bed by 8:30. We'll see. But I miss knowing how everyone is doing, so I'll catch up soon.
Saturday, May 3, 2008
Cara Bambina - Busy Weekends
Cara bambina,
We have had some very busy weekends lately, and you've been handling them like a champ! Last weekend, we drove down to your Grandma and Grandpa's (your dad's parents') Friday night, and you did really well in the car. This was mostly because we left only an hour before your bedtime, and you were able to handle an hour and fall asleep (thanks to a bottle given while in your carseat). You transferred right into the Pack and Play Grandma had set up, and we couldn't have been happier, especially because it was 1:45 in the morning! You slept until after 6:00 the next morning, and that was such a relief.
On Saturday, you played happily in the morning, eat a good breakfast and even went down pretty well for a nap. I was again surprised about how well you transferred into the Pack and Play. I was expecting it to be a nightmare, using the Pack and Play, since the last couple of times you tried to nap in one at your aunt's (my sister's) house you would not sleep in it. But lo and behold, you did great in the Pack and Play! Was it because this mattress was extra soft? Was it because of the way we transferred you? Was it because of the new PJs or the stuffed animals or the blanket? Oh, how I wish you could tell us so we could repeat everywhere else!
After a surprisingly long nap, you, Grandma and I went out for lunch and shopping. Again, you were so good. You get antsy and want to run around, but you are a toddler, so of course you do! The only tough thing was that you wouldn't sleep in the car from the restaurant to the first store (about a 20 minute drive) or from the first store to the mall (a 30 minute drive) or in the mall (even though I tried the front-facing baby carrier, which you've slept in before). You were exhausted, but would not sleep at those perfect opportunities. Instead, after running all around the last store, you fall asleep on the way back to the house. This was only a 15 minute ride, and it was pretty late and close to dinner time.
I had already given up the idea of an afternoon nap and been planning to just put you to bed early. But you were out like a light. I brought you in the house, and you slept through it even though I didn't try to be quiet. In fact, I tried to wake you once we got in the house, but you just flopped against my shoulder and would not wake. So I put you in the Pack and Play and you slept for another 30 minutes! You had a late-ish dinner, bath and bedtime, but you did go to sleep eventually. You did not sleep through the night that night, and in fact we had a tough night. But once again you were a sweet girl in the morning, because apparently you don't need a good night's sleep to be in a good mood, unlike your parents. You had a reasonable morning nap on Sunday, and after playing for a few more hours with family, your daddy and I got ready to get on the road.
We planned it perfectly. You were obviously really tired and ready for a nap. So we left at 3:30, tucked you in comfy clothes into the carseat, and gave you a bottle as we started out. But you didn't want the bottle, and you didn't want to sleep and you DID NOT want to be restrained in the carseat. This is a known issue, but we couldn't leave any later on a Sunday. Your daddy and I simply can't get home so late and go to sleep at 2:00 AM or later on a night when we have to work the next morning. But it was VERY ROUGH to spent 2.5 hours with you crying, screaming, fussing and generally carrying on while I had a headache verging on a migraine. We tried everything, but nothing would do. The only good thing is that it wasn't non-stop screaming. I wanted nothing more than to hold you and rock you and let you out, but we just couldn't. You were great at the stop we made for dinner, and after that you had a decent nap, but it was not easy to get to that point. And the next person who says to me "But babies usually love car rides" is going to get slapped!
This weekend is the wedding of your Godfather, your daddy's best friend. Today, we had the rehearsal and rehearsal lunch. You were simply wonderful! You actually slept most of the hour-long ride up! It was naptime, and you were so tired that you really did just sleep! You were only a little squirmy while I strolled you through Baltimore to the pier for the rehearsal. Once at the pier, you got to run around on the grassy field where the wedding will be (it's such a fantastic spot for a wedding). And run you did! Luckily, one of daddy's friends's wife helped watch you so I could take the occasional picture of daddy and your Godfather and his friends. She has a two year old, so she knew exactly what to do. And she's always fun for me to hang out with and chat with, so while her husband and your daddy are doing wedding stuff, I'll get to hang out with her tomorrow.
At the restaurant, you filled up on bread and applesauce and did not eat any of the meal I ordered for you. But that's okay, because you were happy. And then, you were extra squirmy. But you did really well overall, and I let you run around another dining room which was empty. We had a lot of fun the whole day, running around and tickling and laughing and showing off your animal noises to everyone around. In fact, we did so much, that you were exhausted on the stroller ride back to the car. Once in the car, you promptly fell asleep and slept the whole way back to our house, which is just a dream come true for your parents.
Tomorrow, you will be at your Grandma's all day. This will be her last time really watching you for a long stretch, so you really need to be good. While she's out running some errands, you must also be good for your aunt who is going to be watching you for a couple of hours. I think she's bringing your niece, so you'll have one last day of playing with her before the nanny starts at our house, watching just you. Daddy and I will be gone all day long, and we will miss you very much. But this is an important day for our good friends, and we are so excited for them.
Next weekend is also going to be crazy busy, with Mother's Day brunch, your cousins' (twins) birthday party, helping your uncle and aunt (my brother and his wife) pack and move and baking with your oldest cousin. The weekend after that, we have a lunch and shopping to do for our upcoming vacation trip. The weekend after that, we are going to the zoo to meet a bunch of really fun mommies, daddies and kids! And the weekend after that, we're going to the beach! I told you our weekends are super busy lately. It would really help us all out if you would sleep through the night regularly again. Pretty please?
Ti amo tutti,
Mama
We have had some very busy weekends lately, and you've been handling them like a champ! Last weekend, we drove down to your Grandma and Grandpa's (your dad's parents') Friday night, and you did really well in the car. This was mostly because we left only an hour before your bedtime, and you were able to handle an hour and fall asleep (thanks to a bottle given while in your carseat). You transferred right into the Pack and Play Grandma had set up, and we couldn't have been happier, especially because it was 1:45 in the morning! You slept until after 6:00 the next morning, and that was such a relief.
On Saturday, you played happily in the morning, eat a good breakfast and even went down pretty well for a nap. I was again surprised about how well you transferred into the Pack and Play. I was expecting it to be a nightmare, using the Pack and Play, since the last couple of times you tried to nap in one at your aunt's (my sister's) house you would not sleep in it. But lo and behold, you did great in the Pack and Play! Was it because this mattress was extra soft? Was it because of the way we transferred you? Was it because of the new PJs or the stuffed animals or the blanket? Oh, how I wish you could tell us so we could repeat everywhere else!
After a surprisingly long nap, you, Grandma and I went out for lunch and shopping. Again, you were so good. You get antsy and want to run around, but you are a toddler, so of course you do! The only tough thing was that you wouldn't sleep in the car from the restaurant to the first store (about a 20 minute drive) or from the first store to the mall (a 30 minute drive) or in the mall (even though I tried the front-facing baby carrier, which you've slept in before). You were exhausted, but would not sleep at those perfect opportunities. Instead, after running all around the last store, you fall asleep on the way back to the house. This was only a 15 minute ride, and it was pretty late and close to dinner time.
I had already given up the idea of an afternoon nap and been planning to just put you to bed early. But you were out like a light. I brought you in the house, and you slept through it even though I didn't try to be quiet. In fact, I tried to wake you once we got in the house, but you just flopped against my shoulder and would not wake. So I put you in the Pack and Play and you slept for another 30 minutes! You had a late-ish dinner, bath and bedtime, but you did go to sleep eventually. You did not sleep through the night that night, and in fact we had a tough night. But once again you were a sweet girl in the morning, because apparently you don't need a good night's sleep to be in a good mood, unlike your parents. You had a reasonable morning nap on Sunday, and after playing for a few more hours with family, your daddy and I got ready to get on the road.
We planned it perfectly. You were obviously really tired and ready for a nap. So we left at 3:30, tucked you in comfy clothes into the carseat, and gave you a bottle as we started out. But you didn't want the bottle, and you didn't want to sleep and you DID NOT want to be restrained in the carseat. This is a known issue, but we couldn't leave any later on a Sunday. Your daddy and I simply can't get home so late and go to sleep at 2:00 AM or later on a night when we have to work the next morning. But it was VERY ROUGH to spent 2.5 hours with you crying, screaming, fussing and generally carrying on while I had a headache verging on a migraine. We tried everything, but nothing would do. The only good thing is that it wasn't non-stop screaming. I wanted nothing more than to hold you and rock you and let you out, but we just couldn't. You were great at the stop we made for dinner, and after that you had a decent nap, but it was not easy to get to that point. And the next person who says to me "But babies usually love car rides" is going to get slapped!
This weekend is the wedding of your Godfather, your daddy's best friend. Today, we had the rehearsal and rehearsal lunch. You were simply wonderful! You actually slept most of the hour-long ride up! It was naptime, and you were so tired that you really did just sleep! You were only a little squirmy while I strolled you through Baltimore to the pier for the rehearsal. Once at the pier, you got to run around on the grassy field where the wedding will be (it's such a fantastic spot for a wedding). And run you did! Luckily, one of daddy's friends's wife helped watch you so I could take the occasional picture of daddy and your Godfather and his friends. She has a two year old, so she knew exactly what to do. And she's always fun for me to hang out with and chat with, so while her husband and your daddy are doing wedding stuff, I'll get to hang out with her tomorrow.
At the restaurant, you filled up on bread and applesauce and did not eat any of the meal I ordered for you. But that's okay, because you were happy. And then, you were extra squirmy. But you did really well overall, and I let you run around another dining room which was empty. We had a lot of fun the whole day, running around and tickling and laughing and showing off your animal noises to everyone around. In fact, we did so much, that you were exhausted on the stroller ride back to the car. Once in the car, you promptly fell asleep and slept the whole way back to our house, which is just a dream come true for your parents.
Tomorrow, you will be at your Grandma's all day. This will be her last time really watching you for a long stretch, so you really need to be good. While she's out running some errands, you must also be good for your aunt who is going to be watching you for a couple of hours. I think she's bringing your niece, so you'll have one last day of playing with her before the nanny starts at our house, watching just you. Daddy and I will be gone all day long, and we will miss you very much. But this is an important day for our good friends, and we are so excited for them.
Next weekend is also going to be crazy busy, with Mother's Day brunch, your cousins' (twins) birthday party, helping your uncle and aunt (my brother and his wife) pack and move and baking with your oldest cousin. The weekend after that, we have a lunch and shopping to do for our upcoming vacation trip. The weekend after that, we are going to the zoo to meet a bunch of really fun mommies, daddies and kids! And the weekend after that, we're going to the beach! I told you our weekends are super busy lately. It would really help us all out if you would sleep through the night regularly again. Pretty please?
Ti amo tutti,
Mama
Wednesday, April 30, 2008
Our New Childcare Situation
As I mentioned before, we are changing our childcare situation. My mom has been watching my daughter and my sister's daughter in the mornings (a babysitter comes in the afternoon), but Mom needs a break and requested that we find something else. My sister's daughter will start at a great-sounding daycare in mid-June. Londo and I, however, have not had time to find the right daycare* for the Pumpkin, so we needed to figure out what to do for now.
I'm happy to say, we've figure it out. We asked our babysitter to be a full-time nanny through the summer. We offered what we thought we might possibly be able to afford as a salaried rate. She countered with another amount, and we agreed. We can't exactly afford this, but Londo and I decided that it is worth dipping into our savings to have her for the summer.
We are going ahead for a few reasons. First, the babysitter is so great with our daughter, and we think that the Pumpkin would really benefit from some one-on-one care from the babysitter. Also, this gives Londo and I time to look into daycares that we could start in the fall. In addition, my mom needs a change as soon as possible, and this was the quickest solution we could come up with. It also will be such a relief to be able to just leave from the house without juggling baby and bags, and for Londo to just come home to baby already here, and this convenience is especially great after the rough nights and mornings we've been having around these parts and how late that has been making me to work and therefore back home.
So, that's the plan. The nanny will start 8:00 AM on Monday at our house, since my mom asked for a change as soon as possible. My sister was able to get the babysitter/nanny's mother (who has also watched both our girls and my brother's twins and is also fantastic) to take over the afternoons at my mom's until my niece starts at daycare. We will continue to look into daycares. My mom has offered to fill in if the nanny can't make it, as in if she is sick or something. So it seems to have all worked out.
But it's been tricky for two main reasons. It's not easy to be in a business agreement with family. We all get along really well, and everyone wants to do things amiably, but that is sometimes tricky to work out. Fortunately, we all worked together and figured out how to make this change happen without putting anyone out. The second reason it's been tricky is because trying to afford the full-time nanny means huge lifestyle changes for Londo and me. We are cutting out any and all extras, rearranging schedules and plans, clipping coupons and doing many other small to large changes that I'm sure I'll be writing about as time goes on. We really liked the financial planner, and I'm excited that we will be working with her. I'm sure she'll help us figure out other ways to find the money.
We believe making these changes will be worth it for the Pumpkin, and for my mom who has been watching two kids under two for almost a year and my niece for the year prior to that! Most of all, we are so thankful to my mom for her wonderful (and free) care of our daughter during this time in her life.
*While I loved the Montessori school, they cannot take her until she's is 2. She is 13.5 months now.
I'm happy to say, we've figure it out. We asked our babysitter to be a full-time nanny through the summer. We offered what we thought we might possibly be able to afford as a salaried rate. She countered with another amount, and we agreed. We can't exactly afford this, but Londo and I decided that it is worth dipping into our savings to have her for the summer.
We are going ahead for a few reasons. First, the babysitter is so great with our daughter, and we think that the Pumpkin would really benefit from some one-on-one care from the babysitter. Also, this gives Londo and I time to look into daycares that we could start in the fall. In addition, my mom needs a change as soon as possible, and this was the quickest solution we could come up with. It also will be such a relief to be able to just leave from the house without juggling baby and bags, and for Londo to just come home to baby already here, and this convenience is especially great after the rough nights and mornings we've been having around these parts and how late that has been making me to work and therefore back home.
So, that's the plan. The nanny will start 8:00 AM on Monday at our house, since my mom asked for a change as soon as possible. My sister was able to get the babysitter/nanny's mother (who has also watched both our girls and my brother's twins and is also fantastic) to take over the afternoons at my mom's until my niece starts at daycare. We will continue to look into daycares. My mom has offered to fill in if the nanny can't make it, as in if she is sick or something. So it seems to have all worked out.
But it's been tricky for two main reasons. It's not easy to be in a business agreement with family. We all get along really well, and everyone wants to do things amiably, but that is sometimes tricky to work out. Fortunately, we all worked together and figured out how to make this change happen without putting anyone out. The second reason it's been tricky is because trying to afford the full-time nanny means huge lifestyle changes for Londo and me. We are cutting out any and all extras, rearranging schedules and plans, clipping coupons and doing many other small to large changes that I'm sure I'll be writing about as time goes on. We really liked the financial planner, and I'm excited that we will be working with her. I'm sure she'll help us figure out other ways to find the money.
We believe making these changes will be worth it for the Pumpkin, and for my mom who has been watching two kids under two for almost a year and my niece for the year prior to that! Most of all, we are so thankful to my mom for her wonderful (and free) care of our daughter during this time in her life.
*While I loved the Montessori school, they cannot take her until she's is 2. She is 13.5 months now.
Thursday, April 24, 2008
Considering Montessori
Last week, I visited a Montessori school with pre-school. I've always been interested in the Montessori method, and Londo and I have talked about Montessori schools and pre-schools since before we started trying to have kids.
As I've looked into it recently, I've discovered a few things I didn't know realize would be important when finding a Montessori school. First, since the term Montessori isn't copyrighted or anything like that, anyone can stick the label Montessori on what they do, so you have to be sure that the school you are considering meets your expectations. Second, some of the schools can seem like they are full of Stepford children, which is not what we want for the Pumpkin. A coworker of mine visited one school and said it was like they were Borg children, all mindlessly complying. Third, schools can get accredited, but if I understand correctly, there are two different schools of thought: the Association Montessori Internationale (AMI) and the American Montessori Society (AMS). I believe the AMS school of thought is a little more creative, and I think those that are Stepford-ish are probably AMI which is more structured. But I've learned all this second hand, so please take this information with a grain of salt and educate me if I'm not right.
So I realized that it is important to visit the school you are considering and see if it is right for your child. As I said, I visited a Montessori school with pre-school last week. I LOVED this school! This was what I had in mind when I thought of Montessori. The kids were doing different activities in different areas of the room, some doing puzzles together while another child painted on the easle by himself. The teachers and assistants were engaged and interested in what the kids were doing. The environment for 2 year olds (who are not groups with the 3-6 year olds because of the different needs and capabilities that they have at 2) was very much like a big playroom at home, with lamps and rugs and kid-sized tables, chairs, sinks, cubbies, etc.
The kids weren't all happy little automatons, either. In one room, the kids were doing songs while sitting in a circle, but one or two were jumping up and running around. The teacher was watching them, but not impatient or wanting to control them. Letting kids be kids. In another room, two kids just got dropped off and were crying, but the director explained that they would be drawn into the activities soon and that the separation tears didn't last for long. The director answered my questions and other visitors' questions with thoughtful and caring answers, answers I liked hearing.
Most importantly, I could see the Pumpkin in one of those rooms and really loving it. I'm sold on the school, and don't even want to look for another. Unfortunately, they can't take her until the fall after she is 2, over a year from now. We are still working on a solution for the change we need to make in our childcare situation. While it's great I love this school, I still have to look at other solutions that can happen in the next month or two. And we still haven't address how on earth we'd be able to afford the Montessori school--or a nanny, for that matter. At the very least, I will now work towards having a "Montessori Home" in our house, thanks to the information a person online who I highly respect sent to me.
This evening, we meet with a financial planner to see get a fresh perspective on our finances and see if there is some way to afford what we ideally want for the Pumpkin. Wish us luck!
As I've looked into it recently, I've discovered a few things I didn't know realize would be important when finding a Montessori school. First, since the term Montessori isn't copyrighted or anything like that, anyone can stick the label Montessori on what they do, so you have to be sure that the school you are considering meets your expectations. Second, some of the schools can seem like they are full of Stepford children, which is not what we want for the Pumpkin. A coworker of mine visited one school and said it was like they were Borg children, all mindlessly complying. Third, schools can get accredited, but if I understand correctly, there are two different schools of thought: the Association Montessori Internationale (AMI) and the American Montessori Society (AMS). I believe the AMS school of thought is a little more creative, and I think those that are Stepford-ish are probably AMI which is more structured. But I've learned all this second hand, so please take this information with a grain of salt and educate me if I'm not right.
So I realized that it is important to visit the school you are considering and see if it is right for your child. As I said, I visited a Montessori school with pre-school last week. I LOVED this school! This was what I had in mind when I thought of Montessori. The kids were doing different activities in different areas of the room, some doing puzzles together while another child painted on the easle by himself. The teachers and assistants were engaged and interested in what the kids were doing. The environment for 2 year olds (who are not groups with the 3-6 year olds because of the different needs and capabilities that they have at 2) was very much like a big playroom at home, with lamps and rugs and kid-sized tables, chairs, sinks, cubbies, etc.
The kids weren't all happy little automatons, either. In one room, the kids were doing songs while sitting in a circle, but one or two were jumping up and running around. The teacher was watching them, but not impatient or wanting to control them. Letting kids be kids. In another room, two kids just got dropped off and were crying, but the director explained that they would be drawn into the activities soon and that the separation tears didn't last for long. The director answered my questions and other visitors' questions with thoughtful and caring answers, answers I liked hearing.
Most importantly, I could see the Pumpkin in one of those rooms and really loving it. I'm sold on the school, and don't even want to look for another. Unfortunately, they can't take her until the fall after she is 2, over a year from now. We are still working on a solution for the change we need to make in our childcare situation. While it's great I love this school, I still have to look at other solutions that can happen in the next month or two. And we still haven't address how on earth we'd be able to afford the Montessori school--or a nanny, for that matter. At the very least, I will now work towards having a "Montessori Home" in our house, thanks to the information a person online who I highly respect sent to me.
This evening, we meet with a financial planner to see get a fresh perspective on our finances and see if there is some way to afford what we ideally want for the Pumpkin. Wish us luck!
Wednesday, April 16, 2008
Time for a New Plan
First, I wanted to thank everyone for being so sympathetic about my loss of smell. I'm happy to say that it's returning, but unhappy to report that I think my house is pretty stinky. I never thought the loss of that particular sense would be that bad, but it really, truly is. I'm amazing at how much I was affected. And I won't be using the Zicam nasal swabs anymore. I'm not even sure I'll be using the swallowable tablets.
As I'm sure I've said before, my mom has been watching my daughter and my sister's daughter during the days, with a babysitter/nanny who comes over in the afternoons to watch them while my mom gives violin lessons (which has been her job since I was little). This has been a really great set up for many reasons, including the fact that my mom gets to watch her own grandchildren, the babysitter is a dream, everything is very flexible and catered to my daughter and my niece (as much as possible), my daughter gets to play all day with her cousin who is a year older, and it has been pretty easy on us financially. Londo and I (as well as my sister and her husband) absolutely realize how very fortunate we've been with this situation.
But things are about to change. My mom has asked my sister and I to find a different situation. As much as she has been loving watching the girls, she started doing this over 2 years ago with my niece, and she needs a break. She does not want to give up her teaching, which she loves, is great at, and makes her pretty good money. And she also has her 93-year-old mother now living with her, and she needs care and attention too. Mostly, though, my mom needs some time to do life things that she simply can't find time for anymore, like make doctors' appointments and organize her house and normal stuff that you can't do when you watch children all morning long, work all afternoon, and take care of your mother and anything else in the evenings.
We all completely understand and simply are thankful for the fact that she has watched them for as long as she did. She also says she will watch the next babies through their first year, so the break she is asking for is also so she won't be burned out by the time more babies come. Isn't my mom a saint? She really is.
But this means that we need to figure out what to do. Londo and I definitely have a preference. We'd like the babysitter we've had at my mom's to come nanny for us full time. She is about 21 and taking some college classes, but she just told me that she plans to take night classes in the hopes of working more during the day. She was very receptive to the idea of nannying full time. But do you know how expensive nannies are in this area?!?!? Let me just say, they are expensive. Because she is young and her only experience has been with us (and my sister) the past two years, I don't think she will be expecting the highest pay of this area, but it's still going to be a substantial amount.
We are also looking into daycares, but I'm finding it difficult to find time to research, call and schedule appointments with daycares. I'm also having a harder time finding daycare options for under 2 years old, but this might be because I'm just not looking in the right places. I'm sure there are a bunch, and I just need to make time to find them and visit them. But part of that is because Londo and I are really hoping to go with the nanny option, so it's hard to look into the daycares.
Now, we have always planned to put the Pumpkin into daycare at two, so we'd only need the nanny for another year (at least, for the Pumpkin... who knows about future babies). We are hoping that we can somehow find the funds for the nanny for one year, and then daycare will be less expensive so we'll be able to transition to that more easily. We hope. We don't just hope, we have an appointment with a financial planner to help us figure out if all this is possible.
My sister has found a great pre-school where my 2-year-old niece will start in June! I'm thrilled they've found something that they really like and will be able to take her pretty soon. I think she will really thrive in daycare and can't wait to hear all about it. The Pumpkin would probably do great in daycare too, but she's been such a fussy and needy girl that I worry about daycares not being flexible enough to accommodate her needs. I'm sure she'll be fine, and if we can't afford a nanny full time, than we will find a daycare that will be great for her.
You know what's crazy? I never thought I'd be a nanny person. I always thought daycares were so great and really always planned to put my children in them. But our babysitter is so fantastic with the Pumpkin that it's hard to imagine her not continuing to watch her. But it might be the change of things that is worrying me more than anything.
On a last note, tomorrow morning I go to visit a Montessori school. They don't take children younger than 2, but if we like the place, we will put her on the waiting list. Also, I plan to ask them for recommendations for daycares that take children who are 1, figuring they probably know of some good ones.
So that's what is currently going on around here. In addition to the sicknesses and trying to furnish the house and plan get togethers and working like crazy. No, I'm not busy or stressed at all!
As I'm sure I've said before, my mom has been watching my daughter and my sister's daughter during the days, with a babysitter/nanny who comes over in the afternoons to watch them while my mom gives violin lessons (which has been her job since I was little). This has been a really great set up for many reasons, including the fact that my mom gets to watch her own grandchildren, the babysitter is a dream, everything is very flexible and catered to my daughter and my niece (as much as possible), my daughter gets to play all day with her cousin who is a year older, and it has been pretty easy on us financially. Londo and I (as well as my sister and her husband) absolutely realize how very fortunate we've been with this situation.
But things are about to change. My mom has asked my sister and I to find a different situation. As much as she has been loving watching the girls, she started doing this over 2 years ago with my niece, and she needs a break. She does not want to give up her teaching, which she loves, is great at, and makes her pretty good money. And she also has her 93-year-old mother now living with her, and she needs care and attention too. Mostly, though, my mom needs some time to do life things that she simply can't find time for anymore, like make doctors' appointments and organize her house and normal stuff that you can't do when you watch children all morning long, work all afternoon, and take care of your mother and anything else in the evenings.
We all completely understand and simply are thankful for the fact that she has watched them for as long as she did. She also says she will watch the next babies through their first year, so the break she is asking for is also so she won't be burned out by the time more babies come. Isn't my mom a saint? She really is.
But this means that we need to figure out what to do. Londo and I definitely have a preference. We'd like the babysitter we've had at my mom's to come nanny for us full time. She is about 21 and taking some college classes, but she just told me that she plans to take night classes in the hopes of working more during the day. She was very receptive to the idea of nannying full time. But do you know how expensive nannies are in this area?!?!? Let me just say, they are expensive. Because she is young and her only experience has been with us (and my sister) the past two years, I don't think she will be expecting the highest pay of this area, but it's still going to be a substantial amount.
We are also looking into daycares, but I'm finding it difficult to find time to research, call and schedule appointments with daycares. I'm also having a harder time finding daycare options for under 2 years old, but this might be because I'm just not looking in the right places. I'm sure there are a bunch, and I just need to make time to find them and visit them. But part of that is because Londo and I are really hoping to go with the nanny option, so it's hard to look into the daycares.
Now, we have always planned to put the Pumpkin into daycare at two, so we'd only need the nanny for another year (at least, for the Pumpkin... who knows about future babies). We are hoping that we can somehow find the funds for the nanny for one year, and then daycare will be less expensive so we'll be able to transition to that more easily. We hope. We don't just hope, we have an appointment with a financial planner to help us figure out if all this is possible.
My sister has found a great pre-school where my 2-year-old niece will start in June! I'm thrilled they've found something that they really like and will be able to take her pretty soon. I think she will really thrive in daycare and can't wait to hear all about it. The Pumpkin would probably do great in daycare too, but she's been such a fussy and needy girl that I worry about daycares not being flexible enough to accommodate her needs. I'm sure she'll be fine, and if we can't afford a nanny full time, than we will find a daycare that will be great for her.
You know what's crazy? I never thought I'd be a nanny person. I always thought daycares were so great and really always planned to put my children in them. But our babysitter is so fantastic with the Pumpkin that it's hard to imagine her not continuing to watch her. But it might be the change of things that is worrying me more than anything.
On a last note, tomorrow morning I go to visit a Montessori school. They don't take children younger than 2, but if we like the place, we will put her on the waiting list. Also, I plan to ask them for recommendations for daycares that take children who are 1, figuring they probably know of some good ones.
So that's what is currently going on around here. In addition to the sicknesses and trying to furnish the house and plan get togethers and working like crazy. No, I'm not busy or stressed at all!
Friday, January 25, 2008
Daddy's Take: Day Two
Londo's Diary, 25 January 2008.
Day Two of Project: PumpkinWatch (TM)
Day Two began when I arrived at Grandma's House to pick up the baby. This is my wheelhouse. I have done this from the beginning and I am squarely in the comfort zone. I sashay (Londo is secure enough in his manhood to sashay around once in a while) in the door and peek around the corner to see if she is looking. [Aside: Now, normally in this situation, I catch the Pumpkin's eye and she gives me the sweetest smile you can imagine. On a good day, she will giggle.] She is in the arms of the babysitter--whom she loves--and is looking happy. But this time, she doesn't leap, literally, into my arms. Instead, she hugs the babysitter and mutters.
I take her anyway (I'm the boss in this relationship, aren't I? -- I'm clearly not, I know). She doesn't make a fuss, but I swear she is muttering, "mamamamamama."
We get home and she plays, and everything is going pretty well. She is a little fussy, but nothing major. I put her to bed around 8:00 and she slept through the night again, waking at 6:00. I honestly think she is just cutting her old man some slack. (Thanks kiddo.)
Project: PumpkinWatch (TM) has been a near-complete success so far. We have experienced 0.5% casualties (there was a small matter of temporary mashing of fingers [juvenile], and one banged head [adult] but it was resolved in an expeditious manner). We are nearing the end of the project and must now begin immediate prep work for Project: Cleanup For Mommy (TM).
Cheers,
Londo
XXX
Day Two of Project: PumpkinWatch (TM)
Day Two began when I arrived at Grandma's House to pick up the baby. This is my wheelhouse. I have done this from the beginning and I am squarely in the comfort zone. I sashay (Londo is secure enough in his manhood to sashay around once in a while) in the door and peek around the corner to see if she is looking. [Aside: Now, normally in this situation, I catch the Pumpkin's eye and she gives me the sweetest smile you can imagine. On a good day, she will giggle.] She is in the arms of the babysitter--whom she loves--and is looking happy. But this time, she doesn't leap, literally, into my arms. Instead, she hugs the babysitter and mutters.
I take her anyway (I'm the boss in this relationship, aren't I? -- I'm clearly not, I know). She doesn't make a fuss, but I swear she is muttering, "mamamamamama."
We get home and she plays, and everything is going pretty well. She is a little fussy, but nothing major. I put her to bed around 8:00 and she slept through the night again, waking at 6:00. I honestly think she is just cutting her old man some slack. (Thanks kiddo.)
Project: PumpkinWatch (TM) has been a near-complete success so far. We have experienced 0.5% casualties (there was a small matter of temporary mashing of fingers [juvenile], and one banged head [adult] but it was resolved in an expeditious manner). We are nearing the end of the project and must now begin immediate prep work for Project: Cleanup For Mommy (TM).
Cheers,
Londo
XXX
Wednesday, December 12, 2007
Happy Hanukkah and Child Care
First, I feel so remise that I haven't wished the world a Happy Hanukkah through my blog! I have sent email and told people in person, but here is to the world at large: Happy Hannukah! May your oil always burn longer than it should.
Now, on to my current crisis. The Pumpkin goes to my mom's house everyday while I'm at work. My mom watches her and my niece, who is a year older than the Pumpkin, until 1:00 when the nanny/babysitter comes over to watch them in the afternoon. My mom is a music teacher and teaches out of the home in the afternoons. In addition, my 93-year-old grandma has been staying with my mom since October, although she will be going to stay with my uncle for a few months after Christmas.
In general, this has been working out. But every now and then, my mom has a tough day (like yesterday) or some issue comes up, and Londo and I end up re-evaluating whether or not we should move the Pumpkin into another situation. As you might have learned by now, my baby is rather high needs/intense, and she is going through this big 9-month fussy phase. My niece has been an easier child, but it's still hard juggling two (as many mothers know).
The other aspect is that (IMO) it is never easy to enter a financial agreement with family, and add to that the care of your child and it is even harder. I want my mom to be able to vent about tough times, because we all have them. But I know my mom, and she will not want to admit if it is just too much for her. She likes to believe she can do it all and never wants to admit when she can't (I get this from her!). Because of this, it's hard for me to know when she is just venting and when she really does need the situation to change. If I were just paying a person or daycare, I think we would have a different attitude, but it's my mother and my sister involved in this arrangement.
I talked to my mom about whether or not this is working for her, and she says that she is okay for now, especially because my in laws will be up soon and will take care of the Pumpkin for a while, and then my sister's MIL will be up doing the same with my niece, and then my mom will go out to her brothers and return without my grandma. So things will get easier for her soon.
So for now we aren't going to do anything. But we are looking into daycares and nannies. I don't know how we could possibly afford a nanny or even daycare in this area, but we are evaluating that. It's just that things keep coming up, and it is frustrating to deal with. So I guess we will look into other arrangements and try to evaluate if any other is feasible and would be good for my high-needs Pumpkin.
Any suggestions, advice or commiseration is welcome!
Now, on to my current crisis. The Pumpkin goes to my mom's house everyday while I'm at work. My mom watches her and my niece, who is a year older than the Pumpkin, until 1:00 when the nanny/babysitter comes over to watch them in the afternoon. My mom is a music teacher and teaches out of the home in the afternoons. In addition, my 93-year-old grandma has been staying with my mom since October, although she will be going to stay with my uncle for a few months after Christmas.
In general, this has been working out. But every now and then, my mom has a tough day (like yesterday) or some issue comes up, and Londo and I end up re-evaluating whether or not we should move the Pumpkin into another situation. As you might have learned by now, my baby is rather high needs/intense, and she is going through this big 9-month fussy phase. My niece has been an easier child, but it's still hard juggling two (as many mothers know).
The other aspect is that (IMO) it is never easy to enter a financial agreement with family, and add to that the care of your child and it is even harder. I want my mom to be able to vent about tough times, because we all have them. But I know my mom, and she will not want to admit if it is just too much for her. She likes to believe she can do it all and never wants to admit when she can't (I get this from her!). Because of this, it's hard for me to know when she is just venting and when she really does need the situation to change. If I were just paying a person or daycare, I think we would have a different attitude, but it's my mother and my sister involved in this arrangement.
I talked to my mom about whether or not this is working for her, and she says that she is okay for now, especially because my in laws will be up soon and will take care of the Pumpkin for a while, and then my sister's MIL will be up doing the same with my niece, and then my mom will go out to her brothers and return without my grandma. So things will get easier for her soon.
So for now we aren't going to do anything. But we are looking into daycares and nannies. I don't know how we could possibly afford a nanny or even daycare in this area, but we are evaluating that. It's just that things keep coming up, and it is frustrating to deal with. So I guess we will look into other arrangements and try to evaluate if any other is feasible and would be good for my high-needs Pumpkin.
Any suggestions, advice or commiseration is welcome!
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